August 11, 2013

How immigration can solve all the world's problems

From the comments, an Anonymous replying to an Anonymous:
 Anonymous said... 
"everyone born here would have to leave. Then they would be replaced with immigrants." 
Excellent plan. Here's my implementation: 
Part the first: 
All third-world population to move to USA, supervised by the UN. All, no exceptions. America becomes an exponential-GDP economists-utopia with a population of billions of ad-revenue generators. NY-LA greater metropolitan area. World GDP doubles. Trillion dollar bills on the sidewalk. Third world poverty ended. Sally Struthers retires. 
Part the second: 
The non-vibrant portion of USA is banished to the now-vacated lands. The ultimate liberal-revenge fantasy. Now they can experience first-hand the misery they inflicted on those people by not allowing them to immigrate here. 
They can see first-hand life with the civil-wars, the gang-rapes, child-prostitution, drug-cartels, brutal dictatorships, AIDs. They will see what effect an accident of birth can have on your life. O Fortuna velut luna statu variabilis
Then we will build a wall around USA so that they can never come back. They will try to climb the wall and beg for permission to immigrate, but their pleas will fall on deaf ears. See how it feels, hah. (Also, no one can leave either.) 
The low population density will really make for a miserable GDP. It will be like living in a world-wide Australia, shudder. 
I'm torn as to whether infrastructure left behind should be left intact or sabotaged. Immigrants are so industrious they won't need it.

8 comments:

RonMexico said...

Great idea! It has been playing out in Detroit for 50 years. We white folks left our city to the Great Migration knee-grows. How have they been doing with our former Paris of the West?

Norton J. said...

Now there's an open US borders immigration policy I could get behind.

David said...

Every time we try this in a serious way, we get burned to the ground, or shot in the head by the FBI, or patrolled by the 101st Airborne.

Someone wants us to stick around real bad. What is a master without a servant?

gubbler of the church of reformed chechenism said...

"How immigration can solve all the world's problems"

This may be true. The Israel-Palestine conflict might finally go away if Israel/Palestine were to allow 20 million Chinese to immigrate there. With both Jews and Palestinians having to worry about the Chinese all over the place, Jews and Palestinians might stop hating one another.

Anonymous said...

A nice little documentary has popped up on Netflix called "Whores Glory." It is a remarkable unblinking eye depiction of prostitution in three third world countries: Thailand, Bangladesh, and Mexico. While I felt the most pity for the prostitutes in Bangladesh, where all women are treated like scum and life for most is just a depraved act of kicking downward, I found the Mexican johns and prostitutes to both be assholes. The prostitutes sit around smoking crack and praying to the Murder Jesus. The johns just talk about their desire to perform degrading sexual acts that their girlfriends and wives would never tolerate. This is a smeared flyspecked window into the souls of third world men. It disgusts and frightens me that so many of these animals are loose in the US. Which is why I have my daughters out on a gun range practicing weekly.

Average Joe said...

With both Jews and Palestinians having to worry about the Chinese all over the place, Jews and Palestinians might stop hating one another

Nah, the Jews will try to convince the Chinese that they are being oppressed by the evil Palestinians and that the only way they can put an end to it is by joining forces with the Jews.

Ambacti said...

"With both Jews and Palestinians having to worry about the Chinese all over the place, Jews and Palestinians might stop hating one another"

"Nah, the Jews will try to convince the Chinese that they are being oppressed by the evil Palestinians and that the only way they can put an end to it is by joining forces with the Jews."


I think the Chinese could teach Jews a thing or two about displacing and suppressing violent Islamic wogs.

Funcrusher said...

With both Jews and Palestinians having to worry about the Chinese all over the place, Jews and Palestinians might stop hating one another

-

Nah, the Jews will try to convince the Chinese that they are being oppressed by the evil Palestinians and that the only way they can put an end to it is by joining forces with the Jews.


China will eventually annex Israel, claiming it was always within the empire's "historical" boundaries.