January 30, 2014

Ramzan Kadyrov goes somewhere

I was walking down Massachusetts Avenue in 2002 when Dick Cheney's motorcade of about 15 vehicles roared by, sirens wailing, toward the White House. I thought to myself, Wow, I don't know ... If I had to put the rest of the world to so much trouble every time I wanted to go to a Cabinet meeting to bully the President into invading Iraq, I'd probably just stay home and not bother.

But now I think: Cheney was a piker by Chechen standards ... Via Iron Rails Iron Weights, here's video of Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov going for a drive. I count at least 82 government vehicles (followed by a couple of dozen scragglier cars that perhaps were driven by in-laws of Presidential dogwalkers and other lesser members of the Kadyrov entourage).

I hear more than a dozen bursts from automatic weapons being fired into the air from the Presidential motorcade.

Admit it: What else are sunroofs good for? You let that car salesman talk you into spending an extra $3400 on the LX package with the sunroof, but you've barely opened it since.


If you were a Chechen, however, you could shoot your AK-47 off through the sunroof while steering with your left elbow and swigging vodka from the bottle (or, if it were Ramadan, chewing some primo khat).

Also, in Chechnya an automatic weapon makes an excellent lane change signal in case the bulb in your tail light has burned out. Don't you hate it when that happens?

A lot of things would be awesomer if you were a Chechen.

Have you ever noticed that chicks dig Chechens? I'm just sayin ...

P.S., In my Comments, some spoil-sport good government weenie adds:
Here's a higher quality video of a different Kadyrov motorcade.  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rk1adOy6d1c 
No automatic gunfire though.

Are you sure? It's hard to tell, but what's that stuttering sound at 3:39 to 3:41?
But this one has 6 minutes of cars going past.

Yeah, but they are mostly obeying the speed limit, so what's the fun of that?
I can confirm that just when you think it's over, those are the crappier cars and it's still the motorcade. 
To Steve's point - can you imagine being so self-important that you have 100 cars escort you? Can you imagine debasing yourself by being the driver of some psychopath's 100th escort car?  
Is this a good time to be a manufacturer of siren units for cars?  
If we had Steve's immigration safety board, would they notice any problems with immigrants from countries where the police fire their weapons out the window?

You got something against vibrancy?
P.S. In Tyler Cowen's Beantopia, there will be a certain number of promising new jobs as the drivers of 200th-300th cars in motorcades. 

As Ramzan Kadyrov would say, Average Is Over!
     

43 comments:

Anonymous said...

"A lot of things would be awesomer if you were a Chechen."

Here I am! Rock you like like a Chechen!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxdmw4tJJ1Y

Anonymous said...

Here's a higher quality video of a different Kadyrov motorcade.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rk1adOy6d1c

No automatic gunfire though. But this one has 6 minutes of cars going past.

I can confirm that just when you think it's over, those are the crappier cars and it's still the motorcade.

To Steve's point - can you imagine being so self-important that you have 100 cars escort you? Can you imagine debasing yourself by being the driver of some psychopath's 100th escort car?

Is this a good time to be a manufacturer of siren units for cars?

If we had Steve's immigration safety board, would they notice any problems with immigrants from countries where the police fire their weapons out the window?

Anonymous said...

P.S. In Tyler Cowen's Beantopia, there will be a certain number of promising new jobs as the drivers of 200th-300th cars in motorcades.

And look for the security force's union to demand passengers riding shotgun, if there aren't already. You could be looking at a good 500 people in motorcades as the trend continues - two infantry companies!

Anonymous said...

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052702303973704579353274061324970

Anonymous said...

All of this for a little Russian republic of less than 2 million people. Chechnya has fewer people than the greater Kansas City metro.

Anonymous said...

http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2014/01/30/rush-limbaugh-this-is-the-mother-of-all-scams/

Daniel said...

OT. Who says that the New York Times won't allow for a free and fair debate of immigration?

"Deporting Justin Bieber"
http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2014/01/30/when-visa-holders-behave-badly-in-the-us?gwh=045A7D276F1759AF318D78AFC8DE9A7C&gwt=pay

Anonymous said...

Maybe the mayor of Kansas City should have a motorcade?

I don't see why anyone with man-on-the-street name recognition should travel anywhere with less than an infantry platoon.

Anonymous said...

Cowen's beanville will be a boon for the energy industry.

http://youtu.be/vWF_eQhNyMQ?t=59s

Daniel said...

OT. Who says that the New York Times won't allow for a free and fair debate of immigration?

"Deporting Justin Bieber"
http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2014/01/30/when-visa-holders-behave-badly-in-the-us?gwh=045A7D276F1759AF318D78AFC8DE9A7C&gwt=pay

Daniel said...

>>All of this for a little Russian republic of less than 2 million people. Chechnya has fewer people than the greater Kansas City metro.

True. But they are a highly distilled people.

Anonymous said...

We are getting there.

http://www.businessinsider.com/18-things-that-only-happen-in-argentina-2014-1?op=1

Anonymous said...

True. But they are a highly distilled people.

Kadyrov has about 2x the motorcade of Obama in a country with 1/150th the population.

So Chechens must be 300x Chechenier than USians.

Daniel said...

More Caucasian awesomeness. The saga of Stefan Martirosian: Hollywood, DEA, CIA, Kremlin intrigue. Couldn't make this up.

>>Dugs, Diamonds, International Intrigue — You Won't Believe Two Hollywood Producers' Crazy Backstory

http://www.laweekly.com/2014-01-02/news/remington-chase-stefan-martirosian/

Anonymous said...

Here's the Cheney motorcade:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1l1PXsNsxc

Pathetic!

Oswald Spengler said...

"You got something against vibrancy?
P.S. In Tyler Cowen's Beantopia, there will be a certain number of promising new jobs as the drivers of 200th-300th cars in motorcades."

"As Ramzan Kadyrov would say, Average Is Over!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------

It would seem instead of a despotic banana republic, future America will be a dyspeptic (as well as dysgenic) beanana republic.

David said...

I am Kadyrov
Look upon my works, ye mighty
- Aren't they awesome, bro?

Btw, one of the hazards of being the driver of the last car in the entourage is being hit by falling bullets from preceding cars (assuming the cars proceed in a straight line).

Auntie Analogue said...


"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!"

Anonymous said...

"Can you imagine debasing yourself by being the driver of some psychopath's 100th escort car?"

It actually sounds like a better time than lifelong anonymous cubicle drone.

Anonymous said...

Are you sure this is not the Rommel trick of driving the same vehicles around the block ad infinitum?

Steve Sailer said...

You would think, but the very first car to come by is a white police car with a blue stripe and lights mounted on top -- and I don't see that one again.

Anononymous said...

It's just that man for man they're not as effective fighters compared to Europeans, so you need more rabble for escort.

Anonymous said...

You can spend days on you-tube watching Russian mafia driving cars, I believe the record is +125 cars. Actually kind of strange that noone takes out these sitting ducks.

Anonymous said...

~100 Cars = ~400 gunmen. It's not a motorcade, it's a motorized battalion. And it's justified considering what Basayev et al had been able to throw at them.

To be fair who would care to kill POTUS? What difference would it make? What's the marginal utility of adding another car to Obama's motorcade against the likes of Squeaky Fromme or John Hinckley?

Anonymous said...

You would think, but the very first car to come by is a white police car with a blue stripe and lights mounted on top -- and I don't see that one again.

Ahah! That one pulled over early because they knew that the smarter rubes would be looking for it. Shades of the story where different people get on and off a bus at each bus stop and at the end, one is asked "How many stops did they make?"

unironically scared cossack said...

Steve Grozny is Russian for terrible (look up Ivan the). Grozny was founded and named by cassocks. damn.

Piper said...

The point is that you don't know which car The Checheniest is riding in (driving?) and which three others are carrying his doubles so you don't know which to pot with an RPG or slag with a 12.7mm. The big speeding swerving motorcade of tinted-window SUV's and sturdy sedans is standard war-zone stuff, as well as being a hell of a lot of fun from the inside.

BB753 said...

It's not as if POTUS cavalcades are quiet things. Tens of cars, helicopters in the air, snipers on the roofs. Police cars blocking the streets... Over a thousand people involved just to get these replaceable nitwits from A to B. And still pretty easy to blow their presidential brains out. Remember Mandela's funeral?

Anonymous said...

Steve Grozny is Russian for terrible (look up Ivan the). Grozny was founded and named by cossacks

That's because Chechens never had cities. Smallish villages in the mountains. Grozny's population before the first Chechen war was actually majority Russian. They were majority civilian casualties too, having nowhere to flee.

Anonymous said...

When Reagan visited the University of South Carolina in September 83' they asked for volunteers to drive cars in the motorcade at the student union or whatever. My father was selected, never mentioned how many cars were in it. He did remember several men in surrounding cars discreetly toting automatic weapons though, and a military helicopter trailing the route.

-SonOfStrom

Glossy said...

"while steering with your left elbow and swigging vodka from the bottle..."

Caucasus natives aren't really into vodka. Georgians, who are Christians, make and drink wine. They're not known for alcoholism though. In some ways these people are like southern Italians, with a similar attitude to drink.

"Steve Grozny is Russian for terrible (look up Ivan the)."

The word grozny means menacing, severe, fear-inducing. It's derived from the Russian word for thunder. Ivan Grozny was really Ivan the Thunderous. The English translation of his nickname was meant to evoke images of terrible wrath, not of poor quality of government. The city of Grozny was founded as a Russian fortress in a hostile land, so its name was meant to inspire fear.

Anonymous said...

Fort Thunder - cool name.

.

"It's just that man for man they're not as effective fighters compared to Europeans, so you need more rabble for escort."

Other way round methinks. Europeans have (or had before they lost group identity) a group synergy bonus through improved levels of co-operation. This makes (made) them less effective fighters man for man but more effective the larger the scale.

RonMexico said...

unironically scared cossack said...
Steve Grozny is Russian for terrible (look up Ivan the). Grozny was founded and named by cassocks. damn.

1/31/14, 6:12 AM

From your screen name I'm sure you meant founded by Cossacks, not cassocks, which are priestly garb.

jody said...

when robot cars come into the mainstream, how many will these guys have? a 500 vehicle fleet?

the third world posse in 2050: 500 mercedes e450 electrobot sedans clogging the main highways of sao paolo, riyadh, mexico city, kiev, bogota...houston? los angeles? miami?

still firing surplus cold war era AKs into the air though. hey, those are vintage! we even used them in elysium. if the 1911 has been around for 100 years, why not the AK.

Anonymous said...

The point is that you don't know which car The Checheniest is riding in (driving?) and which three others are carrying his doubles so you don't know which to pot with an RPG or slag with a 12.7mm

Russian HMGs are typically chambered for 14.5mm, IIRC.

Hunsdon said...

Anonydroid at 2:20 PM said: Russian HMGs are typically chambered for 14.5mm, IIRC.

Hunsdon: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DShK>The Mighty Degtaryev is a .50</a>

Hunsdon said...

Anonydroid at 3:38 AM said: It's just that man for man they're not as effective fighters compared to Europeans, so you need more rabble for escort.

Hunsdon said: I'd love to see you develop that one further. Shamil Basayev's early ops (Beslan ruined him for me) were classic, classic examples of effective fighting.

ironrailsironweights said...

One good pileup would wipe out at least 10% of Chechnya's GDP.

Peter

rob said...

How the ef does this man not have his own reality show!

Keeping up the Kardashians?

Pshaw

Ridin' with the Ramzan.

Mr. Anon said...

Ladies and Gentleman, the President of Chechnia: Dwayne Elizondo Mountain-Dew Herbert Kadyrov

Anonymous said...

That's because Chechens never had cities. Smallish villages in the mountains.

No but other Caucasian peoples, such as the Georgians and Circassians, had true cities.

2Degrees said...

Chechens are brutal twits.

Is it a good or a bad thing that some of our women choose to breed with these morons? If you look at modern Maori, they are clearly a mixture between Polynesian and the lowest elements in white society. Through their brown complexions, you can see the features of the kind of white people who appear of the Jeremy Kyle Show.

We will end up with a giant mixed race undercaster, but the whites who are left behind might be smarter? I don't know.

Does this account for high Jewish IQ's? The dumber one's married out.

Anonymous said...

Hunsdon:
Shamil Basayev's early ops (Beslan ruined him for me) were classic, classic examples of effective fighting.

Over one hundred hostages in Budyonnovsk hospital killed and many hundreds injured - is that what makes one a hero in your eyes? Did you have an orgasm on 9/11, too?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budyonnovsk_hospital_hostage_crisis