February 5, 2005

Sistani speaks!


Who won in Iraq? In answer to my question, a reader sends this picture of Iraqi voters celebrating the presumed winner, and comments:

Answer: The guys who look like the Mullahs in Iran won. And that fact is why the "winners" aren't being shown on American TV. We won't want to give the "American people" the wrong idea, for example, that we wasted hundreds of billions of dollars and thousands of lives in Iraq to install in power Mullahs who hate our guts and reject every aspect of America "civilization."

It's too bad all these Mullahs look alike. That makes it difficult to distinguish between the good democratic Mullahs we're handing power to in Iraq from the bad non-democratic Mullahs we're trying to overthrow in Iran.

BTW, the Frumster said on MSNBC that Bush's triumph in Iraq has emboldened him to call out the Iranian Mullahs now that Powell and Armitage (he didn't name Powell but did Armitage & the State Dept) aren't around to control the President of the World.

As far as Medieval Shi'ite Ayatollahs go, Sistani seems like a pretty open-minded guy. For example, his Sistani.org website offers his decrees in handy question and answer form:

Question: My wife has said the phrase “Amin” in her prayer for years. Recently she discovered that saying this invalidates the prayer. Does she have to make up all of these incorrect prayers due to the fact that she said “Amino”?

Answer: No need to make up for offered prayers.

See? He's practically an ACLU member.

Question: Can a Muslim Listen to music?

Answer: It is permissible to listen to music which is not fit for diversion and play.

My favorite kind! I guess Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music" must be big in Baghdad.

Question: Is playing a chess allowed?

Answer: It is absolutely unlawful.

Question: Is having an orgy permissible under the Qur’an?

Answer: It's forbidden.

But, apparently not quite as unlawful as playing a chess.

Question: Are shaking of hands with girls allowed?

Answer: It is not permissible.

Handshaking can lead to playing a chess, you know.

Question: What is the Islamic viewpoint on adoption?

Answer: There is no objection in adoption, but he/she is Stranger and is not one's real child.

Ah, democracy!

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