Here's a suggestion that will never, ever be taken up: Can we stop using the term "porn star," which implies, well, sure, I'm in porn, but I'm a star!
My recommended replacement term: "porn whore."
Another recommendation: Gay Pride Parade be renamed Gay Narcissism and Exhibitionism Parade.
Then there's the dysphemism Single Mother that gets applied to Widowed Mothers and Divorced Mothers as well as genuine Single Mothers (i.e., were unmarried when they gave birth). For example, J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter author (who seems like a highly admirable person), is always described as having been a Single Mother when she started writing, but when I finally looked into the details, it turned out she was actually a Divorced Mother.
Another recommendation: Gay Pride Parade be renamed Gay Narcissism and Exhibitionism Parade.
Then there's the dysphemism Single Mother that gets applied to Widowed Mothers and Divorced Mothers as well as genuine Single Mothers (i.e., were unmarried when they gave birth). For example, J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter author (who seems like a highly admirable person), is always described as having been a Single Mother when she started writing, but when I finally looked into the details, it turned out she was actually a Divorced Mother.
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But where does porn end and where culture begin? Shouldn't pop music today be called porn music?
And maybe politicians should be called whores too.
How about GAY PRIDICULOUS PARADE?
How about free whore? Or TV whore.
Nowadays, everyone is a star.
The misuse of language really bothers me.
Last week my friend told me she wanted to "invest in a new top."
Ugh. I hate everything.
Popcorn movies and Pop-porn music.
Hey, Pride is a sin, the deadliest. I think the parade is well-named.
This is an unoriginal point but it's really weird how working in a porn movie is legal but otherwise it's illegal to have sex for money. I think porn is sorta worse than regular prostitution.
I think I have heard this joke before - "the only movies where everyone is a star!"
I wonder why the term came into vogue to begin with - perhaps to avoid "porn actor/actress" and the implications of actual talent?
I could never figure out why antiauthoritarianism includes a great deal of nudity. I thought for awhile it was sort of like nuclear detente, i.e. "if we're both naked we can't be aggressive cause we'll get all scratched up."
Streaking was popular during the anti-war protest era. Yoko Ono still believes she can fight for world peace by revealing her postmenopausal nude body in public. Many an intellectual college co-ed increased their liberal credentials by streaking, skinny-dipping and topless sunbathing. European liberals used to go around nude all day doing the mundane tasks of living.
I finally figured out it was a way to rationalize allowing oneself to be an exhibitionist or a voyeur while pretending to be fighting war. World peace doesn't really require nudity. I'd like to reiterate that those of us who live in climates where it's possible to fry an egg on the sidewalk or on the hood of your car in the summer don't think much of public nudity.
The "industry" actually has a porn movie awards every year, doesn't it?
That makes 'em stars.
March for Social Justice
* Mau Mau March
* Shakedown Shuffle
* Racist Racket Rumba
So the set "single mothers" is defined by the subsets based on how the mother came to be a single mother:
*Bastard mothers
*Divorced mother
*Widowed mother
Note a single mother could satisfy multiple subclassifications simultaneously. E.g., both a bastard mother and a widowed mother due to having two different baby-daddies for two different babies.
Here's something you left out in your earlier discussions of the term "single mother", oh, Brainy One: single implies the absence of a male provider which makes it much easier to justify giving welfare and other considerations to the brave woman having to provide for and raise a child all on her own.
It's more a justification for welfare than a way to legitimize being an unmarried mother. It also makes a divorced or never wed mother look to be as heroic as a widow who has to face the travails of parenthood alone through no fault of her own.
Divorce and the deadbeat dads who were common in the early 70s kinda made the plight of the previously married woman and the pregnant teen one and the same. In an innumerate society that doesn't ask who's responsible or where the money comes from, it's a pretty effective strategy for making the single mom as much an icon as the Virgin Mary.
Streaking was popular right at the tail-end of the counterculture period, 1973 to 1974. As soon as Nixon resigned, the counterculture ended and streaking stopped being popular.
certainly a contentious suggestion, but i'd like to stop seeing cancer survivors described as "heroes".
heroes? for what? for having the extreme luck of being born into a time period where various super smart guys totally unrelated to the cancer patients, have figured out how to stop a certain percentage of people from dying when they get cancer cells in one of their critical organs?
cancer treatments can be totally grueling and i'm not trying to belittle the situation, but just because some brilliant doctors figured out how to save your life, you're not a hero.
cancer is so common, the suggestion that all the survivors are heroes has gotten retarded. who DOESN'T have somebody in their family who survived cancer, due to great modern medicine?
Yeah, I survived cancer. It didn't take much heroism. On the other hand, I imagine a lot of people give up and miss their chemo sessions and the like, which I might have done without my wife to prod me.
And everyone understands that "single mother" does not necessarily mean "mother of a bastard," so it works out
:languageevolutionteeeeach:
A far more common pest is all of those terms whereby little boys and closeted homos try to embiggen their lifestyles by using a masculine prefix, usually "man" or "bro" --
man-purse (murse), mandals (man-sandals), man-cave, man-laws, bromance, etc.
Instead of being more of a man, they just scramble for better PR, to zero effect --
oh god, is he really trying to defend shaving his pee-pee by calling it 'man-scaping'?
If we're talking language then I have to complain about two of your common usages, American friends.
1. "not that great OF a guy", etc: the "of" is flat out wrong. "He is not that great a guy" - perfect.
2. "I could care less...": come ON! Think about what you're saying! If you could care less about something then that implies that you DO care about it, not that you don't.
If you couldN'T care less about something - ah, now that expresses your contempt correctly.
Free Publicity for Gaga Parade?
Londoner - plenty of Americans complain about grammar. Hell, it's Stuff White People Like!
agnostic - so is Tony Siragusa a little boy or a closeted homo?
You'll be pleased to know, Steve, that porn stars do in fact describe themselves as "whores" quite often.
Oh well, while we're being logical would people please stop saying "least worst" when they mean "least bad"?
"If we're talking language then I have to complain about two of your common usages, American friends.
1. "not that great OF a guy", etc: the "of" is flat out wrong. "He is not that great a guy" - perfect."
We'd also be more comfortable writing "If we're talking ABOUT language" . And we generalize the "I've got" which I presume means I have received to almost all instances of using the contraction "I've got an idea", "I've got to go" . Would've Brits say "I've to leave by 8" or would they prefer "I have to..."?
Steve, if it's not a secret, what kind of cancer did you have? At what stage and how was it detected?
If you think it's hard breaking the news to your parents that you're a porn star, try telling them you're a porn supporting actress. Or worse yet, a porn key grip, although that one might have a double meaning.
"Single mother" is a problem.
The other terms we don't need to change, because they already are starting to mean that. In fact, I bet its the progressives who will try to come up with new terms as 'porn star' and 'gay pride parade' become ever more pejorative.
Cinemasex worker, mayhaps, and Saturnalia.
-osvaldo m.
Londoner:
Not everything about language makes as much sense as you'd like.
Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing. In "correct" English, the phrase "I could care less" is either incorrect or meaningless. But the phrase, originating with drill sergeants in the Marine Corps, is marginally acceptable today, to mean the very same as "I couldn't care less." Likewise, again from the marines, we have "irregardless" presumably a militarily emphasized version of "regardless," which has also passed into the realm of the acceptable.
Not everything in life makes sense (opr needs to, actually).
Your moments of victorian prudery never cease to amaze, Sailer. Porn stars wouldn't exist without porn Johns. Anthony Weiner is both. Illegitimate children are innocent. Both their mothers and their fathers are guilty of a sin that isn't a crime. The worst you can say is that the parents didn't make certain they could afford a child before they procreated. The father is just as guilty of carelessness but has no stigma attached to him in relation to his behavior. How fair is that? Who was the party most responsible for financially supporting a child anyway?
And here you are brandishing your cancer again like a shield to protect you from the justified criticism of your audience. Who d'ya piss off this time, Sailer? The SS is for Sexist Sociopath if ya'll hadn't noticed.
The word "survivor" is thrown around a lot by feminist groups. I think this should only refer to someone who's survived a life-threatening situation. It's okay to call someone a cancer survivor, but something strikes me the wrong way when I hear about domestic violence survivors.
Yoko Ono still believes she can fight for world peace by revealing her postmenopausal nude body in public.
Lets face it, it was never anything to write home about in its premenopausal state.
Oh well, while we're being logical would people please stop saying "least worst" when they mean "least bad"?
Or "best".
The term "single mother," which can, logically, be applied to any mother who is not currently married to the child's father, including widows and divorcees, was adopted precisely to obscure the fact that some women are fornicators.
If we called them what we should, and in the past, did, we'd call the fornicators "unwed" mothers.
Self-destructive, decadent nihilism is so secure in its cultural supremacy there is no more need to "euphenize".
See the recent spat of visually unfortunate "Slut Walks" originating in Canada.
This is an unoriginal point but it's really weird how working in a porn movie is legal but otherwise it's illegal to have sex for money.
It's not legai to do it in a porn movie, either.
Regular Citizens March.
(Just because we dress in assless chaps, and revel in a bath house and drug club culture doesn't mean we can't appropriate your squarejohn culture too, when it suits us.)
Gilbert P.
Steve, what would you call someone like Rocco Siffredi, who has had sex onscreen with over 8,000 women. Would you call him something pejorative as well? I am asking this because a guy like him is seen as a hero and icon by most men. What man wouldn't want to be Rocco and have had sex with over 8,000 beautiful women onscreen in his 25 year porn career? Will you call him porn whore too? Most men would call him porn stud, and if you called male porn actors "porn whores", well, that still wouldn't dissuade most men from wanting to be one.
Here's a suggestion that will never, ever be taken up: Can we stop using the term "porn star," which implies, well, sure, I'm in porn, but I'm a star!
My recommended replacement term: "porn whore."
I like the term "video prostitute".
Because that's what they are.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTBbcaNLccM&feature=player_embedded
Finance capitalism is pornographic economics.
"The father is just as guilty of carelessness but has no stigma attached to him"
How about "single cad"?
Any ideas on this book?
http://www.amazon.com/Sweating-Small-Stuff-Inner-City-Paternalism/dp/0615214088
http://www.americanthinker.com/2011/03/academic_excellence_and_the_mi.html
"Porn whore would be redundant ("porne" is Greek for whore)."
How about pore or whorn?
Today the only requirement to be called a "gentleman" is that you have testicles!
Practically every day, on the local news, a police spokesman (spokesperson)will describe a crime. "Two gentlemen wearing hoods and gang colors entered a convenience store and shot the clerk.The gentlemen took seventeen dollars from the cash register and exited the store. One of the gentlemen shot a female bystander as they were moving rapidly toward their escape vehicle."
Every male is a gentleman, no matter how despicable he is as a human being.
I like the old English definition of a gentleman, "A man who steps out of the shower to take a leak."
Thanks for this, Steve. It's about time we reintroduced terms of opprobrium where they're due.
Most widows would rather be referred to as single mothers rather than widows.
The term widow conjured up images of dusty old crones who are well beyond male desire. Not to mention the aura of death it carries.
I was browsing a local chain bookstore. The isle banners had Spanish subtitles.
(Pause here for effect.)
How about 'porn actress' or is that redundant (both ways)?
Likewise, again from the marines, we have "irregardless" presumably a militarily emphasized version of "regardless,"
No, it's a confusion of "regardless" and "irrespective".
"Finance capitalism is pornographic economics."
Pornonomics. Boy, do they ever screw us.
If you think the housing bubble was bad, just wait when the demographic bubble bursts.
"Flammable" was invented to write on tanker trucks to avoid confusion over whether "inflammable" meant could burst into flames or could not burst into flames. That's a good thing over which to avoid confusion.
"How about 'porn actress' or is that redundant (both ways)?"
'Actress' is now considered a 'sexist' term, and so let's be careful not to degrade women in porn. They would be 'porn actors'.
But if you wanna be politically incorrect, there's sextress.
"porne" is Greek for whore
"Flammable" was invented to write on tanker trucks to avoid confusion over whether "inflammable" meant could burst into flames or could not burst into flames
Reading iSteve is always edifying. I learned 2 new things today. Thanks!
"And here you are brandishing your cancer again like a shield to protect you from the justified criticism of your audience."
Look bitch, I've been reading Sailer since 1997 and this is maybe the third time the subject came up.
"Yeah, I survived cancer. It didn't take much heroism." Sounds pretty matter of fact to me. Not a whole of tears, not even a trembling upper lip.
Let's see if you can get this through your head. I'm a gangster and I protect my homies.
I may have learned as much from Steve Sailer as from any other person. When you insult him -- by making light of a disease that damn near killed him and then using it as amulet to ward off criticism -- you insult me.
If I was in the same room with you the only thing that would prevent me from removing your head from your shoulders is that you're a vagina with legs, and females get the benefit of the doubt from the legal system from the jump. Ask someone in the game, starting with police officers. There you are brandishing your 'gina to protect you from, well, pretty much everything.
My apologies to the sane females on the thread. This was personal.
"How about "single cad"?"
Perfect.
The term widow conjured up images of dusty old crones who are well beyond male desire. Not to mention the aura of death it carries.
Yet if you go back a few hundred years, lusty young widows were all the rage.
Osvaldo M.
"Let's see if you can get this through your head. I'm a gangster and I protect my homies.
I may have learned as much from Steve Sailer as from any other person. When you insult him -- by making light of a disease that damn near killed him and then using it as amulet to ward off criticism -- you insult me. "
Mostly, I'd let you do your moves then do something unexpected which might well end in your getting hurt weallly, weally bad. Sailer's lucky to be alive. Obviously, he has that invincible attitude that many survivors of near death experiences develop. And he's not the only one who trots out a health problem past or present to appear more human when insulting people to the core. I call 'em like I see 'em, punk. The remark was gratuitous in the context of discussing porn stars as glorified whores and exactly how he was distracting from his strident, gratuitous attack on women and the "bastards" loose women and not men are responsible for bringing into the world.
He is sexist & he & the Vdare crew pull this stunt all the damn time. I'd offer to rip your head off but, what's the point, ain't nothin' in there.
Oh, yeah, Sailer, so impressed that you never dabbled in internet porn not once in the 20 years or so it's been available. Must be why God rescued you from cancer.
Let's see if you can get this through your head. I'm a gangster and I protect my homies.
I may have learned as much from Steve Sailer as from any other person. When you insult him -- by making light of a disease that damn near killed him and then using it as amulet to ward off criticism -- you insult me.
If I was in the same room with you the only thing that would prevent me from removing your head from your shoulders is that you're a vagina with legs, and females get the benefit of the doubt from the legal system from the jump. Ask someone in the game, starting with police officers. There you are brandishing your 'gina to protect you from, well, pretty much everything.
Not the person you're replying to, but there's nothing more eye-rollingly tiresome than keyboard-warriors threatening violence from behind a screen.
Also:
Let's see if you can get this through your head. I'm a gangster and I protect my homies.
It's an Internet blog, homie. There's whole wide world out there and you sound like you've been cooped up for far too long. Get some fresh air. ;-)
"Another recommendation: Gay Pride Parade be renamed Gay Narcissism and Exhibitionism Parade."
I love this suggestion.
It's interesting how many of Steve's fans are experts on porn.
Rockin' Robin, Starker, I Get the feeling you guys are both 123 lbs., but in the words of Mills Lane...
"LET'S GET IT ON!"
My mother explained to me, her very young daughter, that there were some men who found other men, instead of women, attractive. The conversation began because a close friend of hers had a son who was quite effeminate and the topic came up again when my mother explained to me that the man who cut our hair was probably a man "who liked other men."
I've always felt Mom was ahead of her time: she told me she thought it likely that these men were born that way or at least that "they didn't make themselves that way." She advised me that others called such men really bad names but she thought such language was horrible and she hoped that I wouldn't use hurtful words to describe them. I had heard my dad on a few occasions say "queer" and "fruit" and my brother say "homo," but it was my mother's words that rang in my ears when I heard friends use slurs so I refrained.
However, after 50+ years of living and after seeing the antics of these people in the SF Narcissism and Exhibitionist Parades over the years, all I can say is that the people who lower themselves to participate in that display are fags.
If Mom were alive, she'd agree, I know. There are words reserved for people who engage in such low behavior and so I have no trouble calling them fags.
"I could care less...": come ON! Think about what you're saying! If you could care less about something then that implies that you DO care about it, not that you don't.
That phrase irritates the hell out of me too. But speaking as a Yank who religiously follows the Premier League -- and thus spends countless hours on English sites and forums -- I can assure you that "could care less" is not some uniquely American misusage.
As for the guy above proclaiming that "could care less" (and "irregardless") originated in the Marine Corps... Um, huh? What a strangely random thing to make such a specific, confident declaration about.
"Anonymous said...
Steve, what would you call someone like Rocco Siffredi, who has had sex onscreen with over 8,000 women."
Itchy. Very itchy.
In lieu of "porn star", I would suggest the term "receptacle"
"Gene Berman said...
Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing."
Actually, they don't. Flammable means that it burns. Inflammable means that it burns readily - i.e., that it can be inflamed very easily. A solid oak desk is flammable, but not inflammable. A tray of gasoline is both.
"In "correct" English, the phrase "I could care less" is either incorrect or meaningless."
I've never understood the problem with "I could care less". I've always interpereted it to mean: "I could care ....... less .......... but I don't.
"certainly a contentious suggestion, but i'd like to stop seeing cancer survivors described as "heroes"."
If I can't stop laughing since reading this sentence, does that make me a bad person?
I've yet to have cancer, but I did get my start in the entertainment industry editing porn. I don't mind those girls being called "stars." It's just about all they've got.
Another one that gets me is when you hear of the police discovering a 'badly decomposed body' during a news report.
Surely they mean a 'WELL decomposed body'. Badly as in badly decomposed implies that the actual process of decomposition never really got underway, and thus the body is in a sate of preservation.
Whilst on the subject of Steve's anti-porn moralizing and disdain, another point can be made.
The general rule is that porn flourishes in direct relation to the lack of control men in any particular society has over its women, ie the more freedom and independence women have the more likely that society is to harbor a porn industry.
A strange and unexpected by product of the general western drive to grant women 'full equality'.The irony is that the feministas refuse to recognise this point (ie this is what a lot of women choose to do, if they are able to do it), and use the porn industry as yet another stick to beat men.
I will win no fans from female readers of isteve, but I cannot help thinking that there is a generalized 'porn instinct' amongst women.
Here's a suggestion that will never, ever be taken up: Can we stop using the term "porn star," which implies, well, sure, I'm in porn, but I'm a star!
You make it sound like it was the porn actresses themselves who originated the term. I highly doubt it.
I will win no fans from female readers of isteve, but I cannot help thinking that there is a generalized 'porn instinct' amongst women.
This is stupid. Why does porn exist? For men to consume. Women don't do it for fun, they do it for money, just like prostitutes. The instinct in question is the male sex drive.
"drug lords/barons" when there's nothing noble about them.
Rap/Hip-hop "singer/musician", need I explain?
Pornstar = Orifice worker?
Mr Sailer,
Please feel free to use any language you think appropriate.
Another recommendation: Gay Pride Parade be renamed Gay Narcissism and Exhibitionism Parade.
An amusing take on one aspect of this.
"Whilst on the subject of Steve's anti-porn moralizing and disdain, another point can be made.
The general rule is that porn flourishes in direct relation to the lack of control men in any particular society has over its women, ie the more freedom and independence women have the more likely that society is to harbor a porn industry."
Like you've got statistics to back this up. What I'm tired of is the "I've got a penis so you women are the one's who are gonna have to control my sexual urges for me" attitude that oozes like puss from this blog.
Ever analytical, despite the 'gina, I'm in a dither over how to diagnose Sailer and his longtime followers. Queer? Maybe. Otherwise, cuckolded by wife or, perhaps, overindulged and got something longer lasting than the clap.
I also saw some mention elsewhere that the Weiner character was being deliberately enticed away from his wife when the fact is he was putting himself out there like a horny 18 yo virgin. I'm not one to tolerate sexually humiliating women in the absence of censure for men who conveniently forget they are married or fail to recognize the potential consequence of unprotected sex. Then Sailer goes and suggests these ids who lack any ability whatsoever to delay gratification ought to be in control of female sexuality. Jeez, last time female sexuality was that repressed the guys were getting aroused by glimpses of stockinged ankles from beneath full length dresses and asparagus was considered pornographic.
Sorry about your herpes/syphilis/AIDS, Sailer. Now give it a rest and let those of us who survived our misspent youths intact enjoy the latitude afforded consenting adults in this culture.
"..this point (ie this is what a lot of women choose to do, if they are able to do it), and use the porn industry as yet another stick to beat men."
but your Honor ...they enjoy it so much. Especially when I wear a black garter belt and net stockings. Sometimes they wear them too.
"Yeah, I survived cancer. It didn't take much heroism. On the other hand, I imagine a lot of people give up and miss their chemo sessions and the like, which I might have done without my wife to prod me."
One thing you can take credit for, whatever form of treatment you undergo (and I know people who successfully went for alternative, non-chem treatments and survived), is conscientiousness. You've got to be committed, intelligent, aware and observant, whatever type of treatment you choose. And it does take some heroism to gracefully endure the nausea and weakness that goes with some of these chemo treatments -- which most doctors say they would forego, should they themselves be faced with the decision. I couldn't have behaved as well as some of the people I've seen go through it. To keep going, keep going to work when you don't really have to, to keep being polite and gracious...there's a case to be made, and I think this what people mean when they say it, not just surviving, but doing it with courage. If you don't think it doesn't take courage, you haven't been that sick yet. It's heroism to have enough integrity and self-responsibility, that you try not to make them suffer along with you.
"Yoko Ono still believes she can fight for world peace by revealing her postmenopausal nude body in public."
A bit off topic, but ... Technically "post-menopausal", but what she is more accurately, as an age-characterization, is elderly. Hormone decline is a factor, but only one, as the body can make hormones that "stand in" for those that decline. Once someone gets into late old age, it's a distant affect. She was born in 1933. Do the math. Her body, so long in the public domaine, was not much different at 52, from what it was when Sean Ono Lennon was born, when she was 42. However, the same body at 82 is something else again. Declining hormones do not so much cause aging, as aging causes a decline in hormones. The research now being done on the aging process, not much publicized it seems, has changed the way I think about the decline and fall of the human corpus. We are going to see some interesting developments in this field in the current century; except that they are afraid if too many people survive too long, the population will become to aged-heavy. So they sit on a lot of the research.
Why are you so uptight about sex, wishing to put more constraints around it? Sure, constraining male sexual urges in the Western civilization allowed for civilization to exist, but still...
However, after 50+ years of living and after seeing the antics of these people in the SF Narcissism and Exhibitionist Parades over the years, all I can say is that the people who lower themselves to participate in that display are fags.
Do you feel the same about heteros in the Brazilian carnivals?
Usually, when people who I'm pretty sure know I'm not married ask if I have children, I say no, I'm single, as a sort of gentle way of pointing out that implying that I might have children out of wedlock is a tiny bit insulting.
So far, no one has taken the hint.
Gay Pride Parades are ridiculous.
On the one hand they say, and we good progressive SWPL want to believe, that the LGBTQRSTETC. are just like us boring breeders.
Then they gotta go put on these outrageous Pride / Christopher Street extravaganzas.
If they want to show that they are boring responsible monogamous citizens like the the majority, I volunteer my straight eye for those queer guys.
Pleated Khakis for everyone!
"My apologies to the sane females on the thread. This was personal."
Apologies? Perish the thought. Your post was most delicious and satisfying.
Allow ME to express my appreciation and gratitude to YOU!
Mild curiosity: Does Robin who thinks she rocks also happen to write for Salon?
She's certainly got the feminist screech down pat.
maybe in the future all porn whores will be cyber-created. Thus PRON.
Evidently, criticism of porn is like criticism of one's mother, to some people. Don't talk about my mom, my drugs, or my porn, or my god, or my homies.
Btw I can tell you cancer survivorship does call on some heroic qualities in certain cases, if you consider as heroic courage in the face of lifelong fear and stoicism in the face of pain/doom. If you don't believe it get cancer and report back to us. Don't talk about my cancer, homie!
Hey, speaking of film, here's one you guys will LOVE!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/06/15/janice-hahn-attack-video-racist-sexist_n_877593.html?ref=tw
I could easily bet a thousand bucks that rockin' robin really is a chick and not a fat man in Scotland. No man could imitate bitchiness that well.
"The father is just as guilty of carelessness but has no stigma attached to him in relation to his behavior."
You're right. Really, a term should be invented to describe such a man, as we've gone far too long without one.
I propose the term "deadbeat dad." Hope it's not already taken.
"Most men would call [Rocco] porn stud, and if you called male porn actors "porn whores", well, that still wouldn't dissuade most men from wanting to be one."
Most men, says who? If more men wanted to be in porn the average pay of male porn "stars" would be roughly $0. It would be all-volunteer work. So far as I can tell, it ain't.
"Most men" probably don't even know Siffredi is, and I'd wager that if you asked "most men" that they wouldn't have a clue - and "most" of them would probably be answering honestly.
Maybe it's time we just start using entirely descriptive terms.
Movie "stars" aren't stars, they're actors.
Porn "stars" aren't stars, they're prostitutes or athletes. I kind of like the latter term because it implies the crassness of what seems to go on in such activity.
That is, if rent-a-hole is not available.
video whore
I could easily bet a thousand bucks that rockin' robin really is a chick and not a fat man in Scotland. No man could imitate bitchiness that well.
And I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Starker is in fact a male, because women don't usually threaten to tear someone's head off, just because they've read something offensive. We all have our problems.
I confess confusion as to why Steve is so exercised by the term, "single mother." As Robin points out, it's meant simply to reflect the state of a woman raising kids alone. My ex sits in London thumbing his nose at me, because child support orders don't travel internationally. I've been employed for several years and I do my best to raise two kids on my own. I don't understand why that calls for approbation as a "fornicator."
My compliments to Truth, for restraining himself from using the word "Toots."
"Mild curiosity: Does Robin who thinks she rocks also happen to write for Salon?
She's certainly got the feminist screech down pat."
"I could easily bet a thousand bucks that rockin' robin really is a chick and not a fat man in Scotland. No man could imitate bitchiness that well."
Really? You'all don't sound any better than she does, though she gets demerits for having started on the offense. I take it you'all are on the defense. How "bitchy" or how "truthful" one sounds depends on the number of people ready to high-five you.
I don't get r.r.'s particular criticisms (cancer patients get too much admiration!?) or her animus about Sailer -- I'm still not sure what she's on his case about, as he seems to present his sometimes controversial ideas in a discussable and even-humored way, and maintains a professional demeanor; but r.r.'s no worse than a lot of other commenters here of any gender, age, class, weight, or race.
"Why are you so uptight about sex, wishing to put more constraints around it? Sure, constraining male sexual urges in the Western civilization allowed for civilization to exist, but still..."
Now that we have the technology, harvest the sperm and make the geniuses eunuchs so they don't have any distractions.
I'm volunteering my services though I'm pretty sure Starker is a chick too.
"I'm not one to tolerate"
I though libs were all about tolerance. Funny, that.
Sorry, Gina, the double standard exists, it's not an evil plot of a few powerful men, it's human nature, and you're not going to get society to change in ways that will increase their assessment of your own personal hotness no matter how much you scold Steve.
-- You'll understand when you have a daughter. Assuming, that is, you can stifle your harpy tendencies long enough to entice a man to impregnate you. Work on it. You're not getting any younger, you know.
And if you're past menopause, well, enjoy your flings with your horny old geezers. Who cares? But do be quiet about it, would you please?
**Oh, and artificial insemination of never-married lesbians ought to be punishable by a long prison term, considering how it messes up the minds of boys unlucky enough to be conceived thereby.
Signed:
A *truly* analytical 'gina bearer.
"I don't get r.r.'s particular criticisms (cancer patients get too much admiration!?) or her animus about Sailer "
I have no problem feeling empathy for true cancer patients, asthmatics, those suffering with backaches or even hypochondriacs. I do have trouble with anyone who cynically refers to an illness real or imagined in order to be manipulative. I've known at least one person who strategically manifested "symptoms" of a disorder that was not something easily proved or disproved. She did this in order to change the topic of conversation and generally get her way.
Likewise, Sailer was distracting us from the fact that he'd found it appropriate to link Porn Whore, Single Mother and Gay Exhibitionism in a post that was barely a paragraph. How does a Single Mother who is parenting her children alone fit in such a context? About as well as Sailer inserting a comment about an illness he supposedly had in the 90s that wasn't caught from a male or female whore or a Single Mother.
I'm appalled at the lack of logical reasoning on this blog. Anyone can pull your strings. Snap out of it.
"How does a Single Mother who is parenting her children alone fit in such a context?"
You're right. She doesn't. A single mother parenting her child alone does *far* more damage to the rest of us than a porn whore (assuming said whore doesn't catch AIDS for the rest of us to pay the treatment for).
Neglect of infants, which a single mother cannot help but do, because there aren't enough hours in the day to both earn a living and meet as small child's needs for attachment and love, creates sociopaths.
Single mothers are not heroes. They should go home to Mom and Dad.
""The father is just as guilty of carelessness but has no stigma attached to him in relation to his behavior."
You're right. Really, a term should be invented to describe such a man, as we've gone far too long without one.
I propose the term "deadbeat dad." Hope it's not already taken."
No the correct terminology is "a cad and a bounder!"
Bounder to be prounounced bounDAH like India is pronounced IndJAH!
Having read the books over again, I have to say ... Steve was right and I was wrong on this.
JK Rowling's books ARE very conservative, emotionally and structurally, despite her PC-pandering to readers in prepared remarks (i.e. "Dumbledore is gay" etc.)
At any rate, you can see the longing for: food, stability, middle class family, etc. in Rowling's books, completely absent from most of popular culture.
Much of the "porn star" not porn whore comes from a culture of plenty where notoriety is preferable to anything, see Jersey Shore.
There's a larger point though, in that language follows but does not create culture.
Since English is very plastic and meaning passes around quite frequently from decade to decade, it is the culture that has normalized out of wedlock birth, not calling women who do so "single mothers." It is the culture that has normalized porn, with porn stars not porn whores.
In both cases a female-dominated culture wishes to avoid passing critical and moral judgment on women, in any case, as part of a power shift. There are no such restrictions on judging Straight White males. But there are on Blacks, gays, Hispanics, and of course women. Things can be fluid -- Gay gossip guy Perez Hilton was lower on the totem pole than Blacks, but Tracy Morgan was lower on the totem pole than Gays.
But the language follows not creates the power structure in culture.
"Neglect of infants, which a single mother cannot help but do, because there aren't enough hours in the day to both earn a living and meet as small child's needs for attachment and love, creates sociopaths."
JSM: Idiot or Old Fart?
What book of child psychology gave you this nugget of wisdom? Or are you still suspicious that autism is caused by refrigerator moms?
Sociopathy seems to be more genetic than learned. You have low IQ sociopaths who don't necessarily appreciate the consequences of their selfish actions; and high IQ sociopaths who make great lawyers and whose mothers would swear were never allowed to cry themselves to sleep.
My stepfather's family, for instance, has at least one prominent sociopath who feels obliged to manage the finances of elderly women from whom he will inherit. I don't know where he falls in IQ range, however, because he doesn't manage his health in a way that guarantees he lives much longer than the old biddies.
"Idiot or old fart"
Let me guess. You are a working mother who has or had one or more infants in daycare, and you don't want to hear this.
"What book of child psychology gave you this nugget of wisdom?"
Findings from studies that infants in daycare more than 20 hours per week had increased aggression at school age.
Here's one:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/06/14/business/14leonhardt.html
Quote:
"Starting in 1997, the Quebec Family Policy subsidized day care for 4-year-olds at government-approved centers around the province. By 2000, the program had expanded to cover any child not old enough for kindergarten, all the way down to infants. This is universal day care, an audacious idea that recognizes the revolution in women's work over the last 30 years.
"When they finished last year, the answer seemed clear. "Across almost everything we looked at," said Mr. Gruber, an M.I.T., professor, "the policy led to much worse outcomes for kids."
"Young children in Quebec are more anxious and aggressive than they were a decade ago, even though children elsewhere in Canada did not show big changes"
Dr. Burton L. White, Harvard Preschool Project "The First Three Years" paraphasing: Fulltime substitute care in daycare centers is probably not in the best interests of infants.
Findings of the adopted infants from Romanian orphanages
John Bowlby's "Attachment and Loss"
and the ageless wisdom of uncounted mothers, rediscovered and by championed by La Leche League.
Whiskey - "the language follows not creates the power structure in culture"
No, it both follows and creates - it's a dialectic process.
In the UK, in the days when bastardy was considered "a problem", there was a charitable organisation, often called on for media comment on the subject, called the National Council for the Unmarried Mother and her Child.
By the late 60s it was controlled by cultural revolutionaries who wanted to normalise bastardy - and an early change was of the name, which became the National Council for One Parent Families in 1970 - thus merging the hitherto 'problem class' of unmarried mothers with the divorced and the widowed.
Bastardy was on the increase in 1970, but starting from a pretty low level. Soccer fans were still singing the following (tune 'Clementine') old song all through the 70s.
"Who's your father
Who's your father
Who's your father referee?
You ain't got one
You ain't lost one
You're a bastard, referee"
By the mid-80s bastardy had taken off in the UK, and the song was no longer heard at soccer games. The name change of a charity is just a small part of a cultural revolution, but those who changed the name knew what they were doing.
"Findings from studies that infants in daycare more than 20 hours per week had increased aggression at school age."
Sociopathy isn't one and the same as antisocial personality disorder. You can be extremely nonviolent and still a sociopath. Conversely, I've often observed people who were physically impulsive yet not at all unconcerned with the needs and welfare of other people. Poor communication skills resulting from not getting enough individual time with caregivers combined with low frustration tolerance are more likely the culprit.
Let's tease out your concerns. Lower income single mothers producing offspring who are more prone to physical aggression that can perhaps spill over into your lilly white community. An us vs them attitude making them certain the man owes them something in the form of wealth redistribution.
There's still a line between someone being unconcerned with consequences because they don't care or because they don't have the capacity to consider such things. I also think you are more concerned with criminality, again not one and the same thing as sociopathy.
Sociopathy can include someone who makes your acquaintance while casing your home for a later theft but it can also include someone who has a stronger will than you browbeating you into buying something you don't need or paying way too much for something you do.
Sociopathy can also include people who have good reputations or prominent positions being willing to destroy another human being for even a relatively insignificant personal gain. Madoff: definitely a sociopath. Likewise, Weiner who has probably never gotten much more than a traffic ticket. The same goes for Schwarzeneggar. Were any of these guys raised by single mothers?
"Do you feel the same about heteros in the Brazilian carnivals?"
That's where homosexuals got the idea. They were mainstreaming destructive no-restraint tropical sexual culture before MTV.
I don't care if they do it in private but i think a healthy society requires a level of public virtue, private vice hypocrisy for the benefit of children and the dim.
@Artemisia
I'm not signed up to any of those commenting profiles on your blog but i wanted to reply to this:
"I failed to at writing a lowbrow, unoriginal, monsters-and-explosions space opera... Apparently making it up as you go results in a plot entirely too much like real life to be gripping, no matter how many tentacled monsters you throw in."
You have to plan it out. I hate doing it because i don't want to know the ending till i get there but unfortunately that's how it is - more craft, less art.
Well, these women are kind of picky about who they have sex with, even while being paid. I think the term "whore" mostly connotes indiscriminateness, doesn't it? Why don't we call them "D students"?
"I could care less" is ironic overstatement.
Mangan just wrote an interesting post about porn. I tend to agree with his take.
I'll point out that watching porn over a high-speed internet connection is better than having sex with a girl who is merely average all around.
Lots of single mothers didn't choose that, they just got left by their husbands. I know one woman who got pregnant while she was engaged, and had her fiance abandon her a couple months before the wedding. This was carelessness, but it's not like she was trying to become a single mother. The other ones I knew are divorced.
The problem here is the same problem you have anytime you try to deal with a social problem that has some element of choice in it: By decreasing the stigma and increasing the support available, you ease the hard lives of the single mothers, but you also make women more willing to become single mothers, and make men more willing to abandon their wives and kids, knowing that they're not going to starve or anything.
"Mangan just wrote an interesting post about porn. I tend to agree with his take.
"I'll point out that watching porn over a high-speed internet connection is better than having sex with a girl who is merely average all around."
If you were my son, I'd warn you about that fancy computer-hussy. She may be beautiful to you, with all her sparkly digitals, but to her, you're nothing.
Still, you seem to have found your bliss, but where's that thing called "touch"? Sometimes I think they're hiding technological advancements from us, and there are more cyborgs running around than we think.
And they wonder why smarties don't make wittle wuns much.
Transexual author, mountain climber and travel writer, Jan Morris, did not think too much of Africa (she/he was skeptical of its "achievements") Nevertheless, when he laughed insensitively at two wart hogs (quadruped type) stomping eagerly into the forest to enjoy each other, an African tribal gentleman (I'd call him that) chided Morris, saying, "but you should not laugh , Sahib. To each other they are beautiful."
Morris was suitably chastened.
FROM JSM....
PER QUEBEC and its universal publicly-funded daycare;
"This is universal daycare, an audacious idea that recognizes the revolution in women's work in the last thirty yaers".
Alas, somehow its not all that noble. It has little if anything to do with recognizing "womens rights" or any such nonsense. It has everything to do with the decline in the white, Catholic French-Canadian birthrate and the sovereignist desire to get women to breed for the cause...
Wandrin said,
"I don't care if they do it in private but i think a healthy society requires a level of public virtue, private vice hypocrisy for the benefit of children and the dim."
I absolutely agree. Those who felt Anthony Wiener ought to cling to his seat "because he didn't do anything illegal" seem not to understand the message sent to kids.
We hid our vices from society as much as we could in days of yore because it served a social benefit. We realized that public displays of our weaknesses had far-reaching consequences for kids and furthermore, we realized that if we all put our weaknesses on display and became exhibitionists we'd descend into moral quagmires.
Weiner was not simply indiscreet in his behavior; he was sending his pics and texts to people he had no rational reason to trust. Even a guy who uses prostitues feels the prostitute has a couple of reasons to keep her mouth shut--money and the law. Further, Weiner used his position as a congressman to actually get those followers on Facebook.
The main point is that whatever behaviors we feel are lacking in taste or common decency, we ought to hide from others for the greater benefit of kids and the order of society.
Gay Pride Parades, the ones I've seen, do no such thing. For a group of people who claim to want respect, I can think of no worse thing they could do to keep people thinking of them as at worst, deviant, and at best fatuous and childish.
"Do you feel the same about heteros in Brazilian carnivals"?
I have never seen a "Brazilian carnival" sir, so I cannot comment on that. I can only comment on things that I HAVE SEEN.
I do know innapropriate behaviour, especially in public, when I see it and what I saw was innapropriate by any standard. Like I say I wouldn't want any of these people as friends, neighbours, co-workers, etc.
NOW IF I WERE TO SEE heteros acting in a similar manner I would also condemn it too. And think as little of them. But so far, I have not. So if you are trying to accuse me of hypocrisy, you are wrong. I believe ALL people should be held to a certain standard in their public behaviour. I don't think being a homosexual should give someone a free pass to act like an ass. Nor do I think it helps the gay cause in the long run either.
In popular usage
single mother = rejected/defective mother
A mentally healthy, desirable woman with child/children is married. If she picked a cad, and was rejected, she is mentally unhealthy, stupid, or undesirable. If she outright chose single motherhood, the same applies.
If she was healthy and desirable and married with children but her husband died, she is a widow. She is also less desirable than she was before she married and had children, but her value is nowhere near as low as a single mother.
For our English grammarian friend (yes, I realize I'm late to the dance) the construction he hates (not that great of a guy) is a partitive genitive, and was at one time quite common in English, espescilly with adjectives of quantity. In fact, in the construction he approves (not that great a guy), "a guy" would probably have been in the genitive back when we still had such things.
American grammar in general tends to be more archaic than English grammar, so an archaic usage should not shock or offend.
At http://www.wmich.edu/medieval/resources/IOE/case.html, you'll read: The partitive genitive represents the whole collection of things to which a particular thing or subset of things belongs, for example, ǣlċ þāra manna 'each of the men', ealra cyninga betst 'best of all kings'. As the translations with "of" suggest, Modern English has a roughly similar construction made with the preposition of; but Old English used the partitive genitive much more extensively than we use this partitive construction, for example, maniġ manna 'many men', twelf mīla lang 'twelve miles long'. Expect to find the partitive genitive used with any word that expresses number, quantity or partition.
Notice the last sentence. Others have pointed out that the partitive in modern American English tends to be used with negatives, and that it has a samantic difference from its "preferred" form (not that big a man).
"A mentally healthy, desirable woman with child/children is married. If she picked a cad, and was rejected, she is mentally unhealthy, stupid, or undesirable. If she outright chose single motherhood, the same applies.
A mentally healthy, desirable woman with child/children is married. If she picked a cad, and was rejected, she is mentally unhealthy, stupid, or undesirable. If she outright chose single motherhood, the same applies."
I see so many extremely intelligent, very attractive, women with no kids and if any marriage, maybe one when very young. Some are unhappy about it (sort of, sometimes), but others--most, I think--are pretty much fine with it. Leaves you free to concentrate on any number of interesting careers and developments. Whether they regret it on their deathbeds, I don't know; but they seem ok as long as they're healthy.
Attitudes like the expressed by the above commenter make it plain why so many women of these days are no kind of mother at all.
"Do you feel the same about heteros in Brazilian carnivals"?
Guess my response didn't get posted. I'll try again.
I don't have to see the behavior of anyone in a Brazilian carnival since I don't live there and have never visited there.
I don't have to pay taxes for the city services that are expended for the Brazilian carnivals as I do for gay narcissism parades here.
I don't have to worry about my grandkids seeing the behavior of people in the Brazilian carnivals on my local news station or pictures of it in my local newspapers.
In short, I don't give a damn what Brazilians do, only what is done in my backyard.
Any list of complaints about word choice would be incomplete without "you'd better be lucky." There's "you'd better be glad (or thankful, grateful, etc.)," and "you're lucky." Pick one.
What I'm tired of is the "I've got a penis so you women are the one's who are gonna have to control my sexual urges for me" attitude that oozes like puss from this blog.
What? There must be secret threads here that I've missed.
I'll point out that watching porn over a high-speed internet connection is better than having sex with a girl who is merely average all around.
Have you every actually had sex with a girl? Or is this what you tell yourself to justify sitting at home masturbating?
here you are brandishing your cancer again like a shield to protect you from the justified criticism of your audience.
Whatever your other faults, and I suspect they are many, one is that you cannot read. A commenter objected to cancer survivors being described as "hero"s. Sailer agreed with the sentiment. Full stop.
If you think you have some "justified criticism" to offer, then go ahead and do so.
Illegitimate children are innocent. Both their mothers and their fathers are guilty of a sin that isn't a crime. The worst you can say is that the parents didn't make certain they could afford a child before they procreated. The father is just as guilty of carelessness but has no stigma attached to him in relation to his behavior. How fair is that?
You'd got an axe to grind, don't you?
That's a rather hysterical response on your part to this rather innocuous passage.
Then there's the dysphemism Single Mother that gets applied to Widowed Mothers and Divorced Mothers as well as genuine Single Mothers (i.e., were unmarried when they gave birth). For example, J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter author (who seems like a highly admirable person), is always described as having been a Single Mother when she started writing, but when I finally looked into the details, it turned out she was actually a Divorced Mother.
I'm not sure what your problem is. A guilty conscience?
"If you think you have some "justified criticism" to offer, then go ahead and do so."
It's been offered, Queerstein. And Sailer's not the only one who uses the tactic. Furthermore, I don't know why you think you have anything to contribute to a discussion of whether or not children should be raised in two-parent homes. People with money and education are going to fare better no matter whether or not their children are raised in a traditional family setting. Single motherhood is one potential source of distress for the family. A father who is present but abusive or has a distorted value system might even have a more detrimental effect. You generalize way too much without having an underlying concept of how people set up experiments in the first place. I, for one, don't apply mere statistical evidence to individual cases. And this blog is anything but a forum for PSA geared towards the mentality of the average citizen. So to attack any female who has ended up raising a child alone indicates, you are either being disingenuous or really don't understand the limits of research done in the social sciences. Either way, you obviously aren't an authority and shouldn't be taking it upon yourself when and where to make polemical statements that are intended as societal prophylactics.
BTW, Jodie Foster says you can kiss her ass. And CORRELATION IS NOT CAUSATION.
Hmm. Now who sounds defensive?
Jodie Foster and the Sperm Donored Children. Two boys, two boys w/out a dad. The ego it takes to feel that you can offer all it takes to make a kid feel secure and loved and happy and fulfilled all because you have womb or money or whatever.
I did a quick google. At least Ms. Foster actually carried the kids, didn't have another woman impregnated with her eggs.
Her partner seems quite bit older. That won't make up for the lack of a dad, though.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-501256/Jodie-Foster-comes-emotional-tribute-girlfriend-14-years.html
Don't know how accurate the article is but there is reference to the notion that Foster's dad was gay. If so, that's interesting.
And no, I am not the one with whom you've been jousting. Your Jodie Foster remark just seemed very stupid.
"Don't know how accurate the article is but there is reference to the notion that Foster's dad was gay. If so, that's interesting.
And no, I am not the one with whom you've been jousting. Your Jodie Foster remark just seemed very stupid."
This is not the best of all possible worlds so even if you find prince charming, marry him, have his children there aren't any guarantees.
There's also the potential you never find the right man at all. Time factors more in this decision for women than for men. A guy around my age or Foster's can easily find a fertile enough female 10 or so years younger. A woman pretty much has to give up unless she's got the money and the extended family to get a sperm donor.
Truthfully, had I the large family including someone who would be an excellent godparent, I'd stop hoping maybe I'll get married before I'm completely done for and just be a mother. In fact, I think I'd prefer motherhood to romance at this point.
I'd weigh the arrogance of raising a child without a father against the loss of what seems to be a generation of intelligent, educated people who haven't had children.
Personally, I always call female pornographic performers 'phallus maidens'.
"I'm still not sure what she's on his case about, as he seems to present his sometimes controversial ideas in a discussable and even-humored way, and maintains a professional demeanor..."
Oh, her? Woe unto anyone who doesn't slobber on & on about the "courage" and "dignity" of single mothers these days.
Just a case of a poster with the above bias who was also too stupid to read Jody's prior comment on the thread. And then went off on a tangent about who she does and doesn't have compassion for (why is this important?)
I saw the same phenomenon literally two hours ago on FB. As soon as a gender debate touched on the single mom issue, SWPL-girl #3655 totally went off the deep end & defriended one of my classmates. Identical styles of argument, right down to trumpeting her "compassion" for others. Funny stuff.
That was silly about "porn whore". Because there are various states which allows porn movies o demand of society. It's true that every year, porn awards have been announced and which was to legal.
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