December 8, 2011

Original research

Wikipedia hates style, wit, and originality, but occasionally some slips through, as in this Wikipedia article: "Recurring in-jokes in Private Eye" (which is an English satirical magazine). 

Britain combines both stricter libel laws with more hostile, scurrilous, and enterprising journalists than are typically found in America, where journalists tend to be sympathetic and responsible-minded toward the bigshots they write about. Thus, the English have more running gags, such as:
"Tired and emotional" was a phrase used to describe 1960s Labour party cabinet minister and Deputy Leader George Brown, who had a drink problem. It first appeared in Private Eye in a parody memo supposedly informing civil servants how to describe Brown's conduct and state of mind. Due to the near-impossibility of proving intoxication without forensic evidence, journalists came to use the phrase as a way of describing drunkenness without inviting libel charges.
Lord Gnome is purported to be the proprietor of the magazine, and is an amalgam of various different media magnates. Originally modelled on figures including Lord Beaverbrook and Lord Thomson of Fleet, first appearing under the name "Aristides P. Gnome" in the early 1960s, Lord Gnome has since accumulated other characteristics to encompass the likes of Rupert Murdoch. He is portrayed in the magazine as a man of great wealth, greed, unscrupulousness and vulgarity. Lord Gnome rarely writes under his own name, but issues his proclamations, editorials and threats through a fictional underling named Emmanuel Strobes, with reference frequently made to his Lordship's "assistant", Miss Rita Chevrolet. Lord Gnome, as well as being a media magnate, is regularly referred to as having other business interests, frequently mentioned in his opening letter in each issue. Special offers from "Gnomemart" frequently appear in the magazine, which also carries an occasional column called "The Curse of Gnome", chronicling the subsequent misfortunes of those who have in the past taken legal action against the publication. In 1993, during the only televised ceremony for Private Eye's Bore of the Year Awards ("the Boftys"), Lord Gnome (played by Peter Cook) made a brief appearance on a satellite hook-up from his yacht, appearing to fall overboard during the broadcast, in a parody of Robert Maxwell's death. 

In 1989, I conducted a negotiation with Robert Maxwell's firm, via his minion Jack Napier. Maxwell intervened at the last moment to try to cheat my company out of one million dollars. We told him to jump in the lake. That evening I went to see Tim Burton's Batman. Jack Nicholson's Joker character turned out to be named Jack Napier. About a year later, Maxwell fell off his yacht, just before his embezzlement of his employee's pension funds was revealed.
St Cake's School is an imaginary public school, run by Mr R.J. Kipling (BA, Leicester). ... The school's motto is Quis paget entrat (Who pays gets in), though variations on this arise from time to time, such as when the school decided to only admit the daughters of very rich Asian businessmen, and the motto became All praise to the prophet, and death to the infidel. ... 
Neasden is a Greater London suburb which is the location of various parody institutions, and is often given as the origin of fictional letters. ... Stories from the world of football are satirised in "reports" by E.I. Addio (a reference to the football chant Ee Aye Addio) about the mythical and notoriously underperforming club Neasden F.C., with quotes from its manager "tight-lipped, ashen-faced supremo Ron Knee (59)" ... Neasden nearly always lose by a huge margin, often owing to own goals scored by veteran player "Baldy" Pevsner, who often score a consolation "one boot", and in spite of the efforts of their goalkeeper, "One-legged net-minder Wally Foot". Neasden is also the setting for the regular column Neasden Police Log, a fictional log-entry style police report that almost invariably depicts the police as racist, incompetent, and obsessed with observing politically-correct rules at the expense of maintaining law and order. 
... Dave Spart was a parody of the stereotypical left-wing agitator who featured in editions of the 1970s and from time to time since (for example, after the street riots in England in 2011). Occasionally, his sister, Deidre Spart, has offered her views. 
Piers Morgan is referred to as Piers Moron, sometimes Piers "Morgan" Moron 
Capita, a long-term favourite target of Private Eye, is frequently called "Crapita" and "the world's worst outsourcing firm". 
... The Guardian newspaper is generally referred to as "the grauniad", in reference to the paper's reputation for typographical errors and mistakes and its lower-case masthead logo. ... 
The Department of Trade and Industry was often the "Department of Timidity and Inaction". ... 
The Financial Services Authority is invariably referred to as "The Fundamentally Supine Authority" in reference to its reluctance to act and its seemingly close relationship with the industry it is supposed to regulate,... 
At one point the magazine printed many letters from a reader named "Ena B Maxwell", of "Headington Hall, Oxfordshire", the real-life address of Robert Maxwell. The letters were written by the Private Eye editorial team, and the pseudonym was attached to suggest that he was writing to the magazine under an assumed identity. The letters were careful not to make any legally actionable claims, instead containing material that was impertinent or absurd in order to ridicule Maxwell. 
Mary Ann Bighead, a parody of journalist Mary Ann Sieghart, often writes columns trumpeting her own brilliance and that of her daughters Brainella and Intelligencia. 
"(Shome mishtake, shurely? Ed)" is supposedly a blue pencil by the editor, who is slurring a little after lunch. It may have allusions to the late Bill Deedes (Lord Deedes), who did slur that way. Bill Deedes, The late Lord Deedes, was also the eponymous Dear Bill that the fictional Mr Thatcher was forever writing to while his wife was in government. These articles were actually written by John Wells.

Deedes accompanied Evelyn Waugh to Ethiopia in the 1930s and was more or less the model for the hero of Scoop, Boot of The Beast. He died in 2007.
Spurious surrealism 
Towards the end of each issue, the magazine contains increasingly surreal jokes, references and parodies. Many of these have developed over time, and are thus now very familiar to long-term readers. 
The Sizzler – an alleged fried breakfast for sale at extortionate prices on any train journey mentioned. At the first mention of the Sizzler, the article in which it appeared would be sidelined into a recital of the item's deliciousness. 
... The number 94 is used as a generic large number, to indicate that something is lengthy and boring. This originated with some articles ending mid-sentence with "(continued page 94)" - a page which does not exist, as Private Eye is much shorter than that. This has since been extended to anything else involving a number, e.g. "the awards ceremony, in its 94th year", or spoof transcripts of radio broadcasts which end with "(continued 94 MHz)". 
Phil Space is a fictional journalist. He 'writes' articles mainly to fill space on the page, hence his name (and similarly Phil Pages, Phil Airtime (a radio news correspondent) and Philippa Column). The articles are rarely informative or useful and are often completely irrelevant. A supposed continental counterpart, Monsieur Phil Espace, is sometimes mentioned when the story has an international background.

I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.


Anonymous said...

My very favourite Private Eye feature was the late, great Auberon Waugh's satirical diary.
You should read 'A Turbulent Decade' - the collected diaries of Auberon Waugh 1970-80.

Apart from being hysterically funny, they'll teach you more about Britain (and the class system)than anything else you'll ever read.

Le Sigh said...

I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.

Well, the recurring in-joke here appears to be that supposed high intelligence didn't take the commenters very far in life. :-)

The central obsession is concerned with why this must be and who's to blame (Jews? White women?).

I can't think of a proper acronym for these types, so I can't help you there.

@First anon

British social dynamics are now very, very different from the time of that book.

Timothy Black said...

"(1) Scotch-Irish: A member of a specific, non-Scotch-Irish ethnic group. Originated when a regular commenter, member of and chauvinist for that people, declared himself to be 'Scotch-Irish,' to the general derision of the board. A certain unwritten rule in iSteveland forbids specifying the definiens explicitly, but for regular readers that would anyway be de trop."

Timothy Black said...

"(2) NAM: Non-Asian minority; Sailer's coinage. Cf. John Derbyshire on 'sun people' (contra 'ice people')."

Timothy Black said...

"(3) Troof: AAVE pronunciation for 'truth,' the handle of iSteve's only regular, black commenter (as far as anyone knows). Begrudgingly, tacitly respected for posting on a board with at least a couple commenters who absolutely hate black people."

Whitey Whiteman III said...

On iSteve jokes, the Scots-Irish = Jew thing comes to mind.

Timothy Black said...

"(4) SWPL/SWPLer: stuff-white-people-like, in reference to the (briefly) popular blog of that name, as a designation for a certain set: viz., young, hip, reflexively liberal, urban dwellers, whose lifestyle choices and political statements invite derision as, ultimately, status striving. Bogeyman (after women, broadly construed) of regular, Scotch-Irish commenter."

Timothy Black said...

"(N) KMac: Kevin MacDonald, long-time member of Canadian sketch-comedy group The Kids in the Hall; known anti-Semite."

Timothy Black said...

"(N+1) asdfasdf (AKA Neanderthal Liberation Front, Puppy Saga N, anonymous): poster of longest comments on iSteve. Also notable: movie buff, Polish expatriate, lover of puns."

Clyde said...

I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.' Phil Blog.

dearieme said...

I refer m'learned friend to the reply given in Arkell v. Pressdram.

eh said...

Wikipedia hates style, wit, and originality...

Not to mention on occasion facts.

Anonymous said...

No mention of intrepid journo "Lunchtime O'Booze" or Neasden FC's most die-hard supporters, Sid and Doris Bonkers?

Anonymous said...

A popular running joke in the Private Eye letters page is the recurring use of this photo of Andrew Neil looking ridiculous.

Andrew Neil was at one time a Murdoch newspaper editor (Sunday Times)and seen as an enemy of Lord Gnome, he still appears on the BBC today.

The joke is propagated by readers writing in to refer to a current news story and asking if perhaps the magazine might have a picture to illustrate the story.

At one time the picture was being used in every issue, seems to have tailed off in recent years.

Nick said...

Regarding style and wit in Wikipedia, I enjoy the entry for Eddie Murphy's song "Party All The Time". From the synopsis:

The song tells a harrowing tale from the perspective of a heartbroken lover, portrayed in the first-person by Eddie Murphy. He begins by questioning, perhaps rhetorically, why the female with whom he is currently participating in a relationship would want to cause him emotional pain. The narrator goes on to list extravagant items he's purchased for her, including, but not limited to: Champagne, Roses, and Diamond rings. Despite the items that the narrator has given, the female still insists on staying out all night (presumably in the company of other men). The narrator then poses perhaps another rhetorical question as to what he should do to remedy this depressing situation. The listener is then repeatedly informed that the narrator's "girl" wishes to attend nightclubs and house parties at all hours of the day and night. Later on, the narrator points out that he's acted as a voyeur and observed said female whilst she was present at an unknown nightclub. She was seen providing her telephone number to virtually every male patron of the club with whom she came in verbal contact. We are then informed that the narrator's female companion never arrives at their place of residence in the evening. Her absence is believed to be caused by infidelity, presumably with one or many of the men with whom she became acquainted earlier that evening. The narrator then goes on to wish that his female companion would instead have sexual intercourse with him, instead of the many other men with whom she has been copulating.

Rainforest Giant said...

'Unexpectedly' for anything that the MSM should have expected. "Unexpectedly Jobless Rates Increased for 11th Quarter in a Row"

"Unexpectedly Anti-Copt Unrest in Egypt Following Elections"

Something about being closer to Canada for education achievement, "Students with Exposure to Canadian Border Show Continued Academic Success"

AMac said...

> I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.

Yes, that's a great idea. What could possibly go wrong?

Anonymous said...

Perhaps some of your commenters can start the list. Here are some:

-Who? Whom?
-Not getting the joke
-Watsoning (what happens when someone explains the punch line)
-Golf course architecture
-Sailer Strategy
-Inland Empire

Default User said...

I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes...

It is more commenters than iSteve, but "Scotch-Irish" would have to rank up there.

Ed said...

The funniest joke in that Wikipedia article is the text at the top, warning that the article "may contain original research."

David Davenport said...

... a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.


Anonymous said...

Wow the British are not funny.

Anonymous said...

"Taki was imprisoned for four months for possession of cocaine. Private Eye magazine sometimes refers to this by nicknaming him 'Takealotofcokeupthenos'. He documented his prison experiences in a 1992 book."

Anonymous said...


Ah, how shall I put this? Jews, Negroes, Mexicans, Chinamen, and Brahmin (of both kinds).

-osvaldo M.

Anonymous said...

terrorist speedboats

Anonymous said...

OT, Steve, but things, are they a'changin'?

A layman's, popular publication like Science Daily has this up this morning: "Why Aren't We Smarter Already? Evolutionary Limits on Cognition"

In the article is this paragraph:

"Even increasing general intelligence can cause problems. Hills and Hertwig cite a study of Ashkenazi Jews, who have an average IQ much higher than the general European population. This is apparently because of evolutionary selection for intelligence in the last 2,000 years. But, at the same time, Ashkenazi Jews have been plagued by inherited diseases like Tay-Sachs disease that affect the nervous system. It may be that the increase in brain power has caused an increase in disease."

A step forward for HBD. Wouldn't have happened a few years ago.

PublicSphere said...

The list of Labels in the right-hand column makes it easy to get a good start on this, although the first few -- Obama, movies, political economy, sports, and education -- are fairly bland.

I can't be the only one who first explored the land of iStevia by clicking on unlikely Labels for explanation: Men with Gold Chains; partly inbred extended family; Why lesbians aren't gay; donme; mulatto elite; etc.

In fact, as you get down to the Labels that have only been used once or twice, you get arguably more distinctive and characteristic themes: Yezidis; Baroque O'Blarney; etc.

Seismic Puppy said...

"I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions."

It's too bad Sailer raised a fuss about Jobs book being called 'isteve'. If the Jobs book had been released as 'isteve bio', then all those searching 'isteve' might have come across Sailer by accident.

helene edwards said...

Jack Napier won best interracial release at the 2007 AVN Awards.

Kylie said...

"I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions."


>Obama's fabulous career
[You only used this once but I thought it caught the silliness of Obama-worship beautifully as well a being a good pun.]

>In other news/Breaking news....[Used to introduce business as usual]

>golf and golf courses
[Maybe not an obsession but certainly a preoccupation]

Kylie said...

"'I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.'

Yes, that's a great idea. What could possibly go wrong?"

Love it.

Kylie said...

"@First anon

British social dynamics are now very, very different from the time of that book."

First anon neither stated nor implied otherwise.

God, even your know-it-all nitpicking is creepy.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe no one's mentioned "Women and Minorities Hardest Hit" yet.

RWF said...

One of the more recent Private Eye features is the "From Our Message Board" which parodies the incredibly dumb, illiterate and tedious comment sections that newspapers and blogs have. Which is er not like anything I've seen....

Noah172 said...

"recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions"

White women schtup (to use the Scots-Irish vernacular of a certain frequent commenter) black alpha men instead of white beta male providers.

85, 90, 100, 107, 115: the median IQs, respectively, of Negroes, mestizos, white Americans, northeast Asians, and Ashkenazi Scots-Irish

Diversity Recession

Sand States

high-low coalition (aka the right tail of the bell curve using the left tail to attack the middle bulge)


the Dirt Gap

greater LA ethnic mosaic

Anonymous said...

The day prior the Post ran a story about how only 300,000 illegals were apprehended at the border instead of the usual 1,000,000. According to their logic the drop in attempted illegal crossings means the time for amnesty is now!

I read that and was reminded of another running gag here.

"Immigration, the solution for boom economies and bust economies! A floor wax and a dessert topping!"

Anonymous said...

Love it.

Yeah, I missed an opportunity:

"'I need a similar list of recurring iSteve in-jokes, acronyms, and obsessions.'

Yes, that's a great idea. What could possibly go wrong?"

Women and Minorities Hardest Hit!

Anonymous said...

Hell, nobody's even mentioned "Vibrant" yet.

Truth said...

"The suspect is described as a white male wearing a maroon hoodie, and is still on the loose."

Uh oh!

Anonymous said...

Truth, you dog! You beat me to "The Hunt for the Great White Male Defendant"!

Geoff Matthews said...

Given your description of race as an extended family, why not refer to the various minorities as extended families?

ie, members of this family in this state exhibit SAT scores that are one stdv below the mean.

Anonymous said...

Someone else has beat you to it:

Anonymous said...

The late great English comedian Peter cook was Lord Gnome and the proprietor of Private Eye.
I believe Cook's yeraly dividend from ownership of the Eye was a crate of wine.Peter Cook died realively young of alcoholism.
It was a coterie of Shrewsbury Public School (ie private) and Cambridge University types that were behind Private Eye - Ricahrd Ingrams, Peter Cook, John Wells, Willy Rushton, Christopher Booker etc.Some of these became famous British tv personalities on the strength of the 'Cambridge footlights review' and the 'satire boom' of the 1960s.In turn they were heavily linked to Monty Python and popular 1970s BBCTV comedians 'The Goodies' (has that ever been shown in America?).
A crucail link between all these comedians/satirists was the TV personality David Frost.
Peter Cook once amousl called David Frost 'the Bubonic Plagiarist'.
Speaking of David Frost, Richard Nixon is clearly an obsessive topic here.Steve only needs mention 'Richard Nixon' in passing to provoke a flurry of comments.
Why?, why is that old jowly swine still so beguiling after all these years?

Noah172 said...

Yeah, how could we forget "vibrant"?

Some more:

Occam's butterknife

the Iraq Attaq

Olympic track and field events (an obsession that pops up every four years, then vanishes)

green grass of tunnel said...

The Science Daily "Why Aren't We Smarter Already?" link above was broken; it should be:

Jumping Jehoshaphat said...

If I ever get around to playing with Latent Semantic Analysis I'll let you know what I come up with (if I'm not misunderstanding the technology). Of course, any less lazy iSteve readers are free to beat me to it.

Anonymous said...

Another Peter Cook anecdote:

During the Sex Pistols' disasterous American tour of 1978, an increasingly useless and drugged out Sid Vicious used to perform all sorts of grotesque antics on stage whilst suffereing heroin withdrawal symptoms.In one concert, Vicious, who had publically slashed his bare chest open responded to a female audience member's beckoning only to be punched very hard in the mouth resulting a streaming bloody lip.
Peter Cook, back in England read of the said incident and sardonically and cahracteristically quipped "Well, I suppose this must be the first case in history of the fan hitting the shit".

Strangely enough, Peter Cook was the host of a very short lived UK music show called 'Revolver' that was broadcast way back in the late 70s that showcased mainly punk and new-wave bands.
No seems to remember it.

SFG said...

Jewish Christmas Carols and the lack of a Kwanzaa song come to mind...

If you want to make fun of Whiskey and mock the philo-Semitic wing of your commenters as well, how about 'Wir mussen die Scotch-Irish ausrotten?' (And no, I don't think 'Scotch-Irish' should be translated)

Morris Dees' Poverty Palace...

The Donmeh...

Bad schools really being bad students...

Sailer Strategy...

Wishing America's immigration policy were more like Israel's, and how the media militates against that hypocritically...

This really is a fun twisted little family online, even if me and Svigor would probably come to blows IRL. (I bet he'd win, too.)

Tiger Mothers vs SWPL (more recent)

The Dirt Gap and Affordable Family Formation

Invade the World/Invite the World/In Hock To The World

Seismic Puppy said...

"Wikipedia hates style, wit, and originality"

All general encyclos do. Exceptions are eccentric encyclos like David Thompsons Encyclo of Film which is a bunch of personal opinions.

edgy gurl said...

How odd that Sailer would be searching for his own in-jokes.

What did you maniacs do with him? Is he really dead?

Anonymous said...

An obsession:

the failure (or success?)of a college player to be taken seriously by the NFL if one is a white running back (or wide receiver, cornerback, safety)

Anonymous said...

One thing I noticed is tha t tht the commetners on the new york times ar a lot more nationalistic than the apper..... a lot of nasty foreigner bashing tghere

Anonymous said...

The best satirical encyclopedia is encyclopedia dramatica. One of its articles, "Aboriginal", got the site banned in Australia.

Off topic, Victor Ostrovsky claimed that Robert Maxwell was murdered by the Mossad for embezzling funds.

Anonymous said...

Anybody mentioned Jewish-French philosopher, humanitarian interventionist activist and part-time DSK apologist Bernard-Henri Lévy? Like Malcolm Gladwell he has a way of checking all the boxes that set of Steve's idiot alarm.

I'm sure there are quite a few others out there, Ken Burns, Amanda Marcotte and Maureen Dowd come to mind. There's a whole list.

Also, "race flat-earthers". That's just great.

Drawbacks said...

Anyone mention 'hate facts' yet?
'Beta kvetching', to coin a phrase.
An odd obsession among commenters with estimating President Obama's IQ to three significant figures.

Anonymous said...

They Do It Better In...

Real Soon Now

my fave is your maxim on female journalists

Drawbacks said...

The Eye had a bit of stick for anti-semitism in times past. Polymath Jonathan Miller claimed Ingrams et al were like public school bullies who had it in for him, the Jewish swat. There was a lot of talk of 'Jewish financiers' in the early days, too, apparently.
On the other hand Chaim Bermant claimed that James Goldsmith "didn't know he was Jewish until he was attacked by Private Eye." Don't recall Robert Maxwell having played that card, though.
Talking of "Captain Bob", just after his death, Prince Andrew allegedly wandered about some function at Buckingham Palace telling anyone who'd listen: "I heard he had an Irish tart on board. He said 'Why don't you toss me orf?', so she did!"

josh said...


Fundamental constant of sociology (though Steve borrowed this)

cousin marriage

something about who your relatives are

Anonymous said...

"Hart was best known for his 1971 invention of electronic books, or eBooks. He founded Project Gutenberg, which is recognized as one of the earliest and longest-lasting online literary projects. He often told this story of how he had the idea for eBooks. He had been granted access to significant computing power at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. On July 4 1971, after being inspired by a free printed copy of the U.S. Declaration of Independence, he decided to type the text into a computer, and to transmit it to other users on the computer network. From this beginning, the digitization and distribution of literature was to be Hart's life's work, spanning over 40 years.

Hart was an ardent technologist and futurist."

Read the rest here;

Too bad he did not leave a real future.

Drawbacks said...

Other iSteve in-jokes include the character Dov Obiang, spokesman for EQUAPAC (Equatorial-Guinean-American Political Action Committee), who is quoted on the implications for Equatorial Guinea and US-EG relations of almost any news story; and frequent references to Sailer's imaginary magnum opus, The Other PC: How Portnoy's Complaint Explains Everything About Modern-Day America

Truth said...

" Svigor said...
Truth, you dog! You beat me to "The Hunt for the Great White Male Defendant"!"

What's going to be first, the mass media finding the great white defendant, or Don Wassal finding a great white cornerback?

Drawbacks said...

"Whitehouse spokesman [apparently also a US senator, Mexican Congressional deputy, member of the Knesset, hedge fund manager and aide to Carlos Slim] Cuauhtemoc Kauffman" is often quoted on the importance to "all Americans" of some or other government measure.

Anonymous said...

From Irish savant, cultural enrichers = 3rd world immigrants

Anonymous said...

Somewhere in the history of baseball is the answer to everything.

Movie reviews that go into so much detail about the histories, motivations and dynamics of the actors, producers, directors and writer that you aren't quite sure what the movie that is being reviewed is actually about.

ziel said...


"How's that working out?"

The brutally uncompromising, incorruptible, and austerely-officed managers from Bensonhurts AK who negotiate with spoiled marketing pitchmen from Chicago.

Police escorts for AIPAC convention attendees going to lunch.

That guy who wrote faster than anybody who can write better and better than anyone who could write faster.

APH said...

That the elite in Hispanic countries (particularly Mexico) never turn out to be particularly Mexican (as we commonly think of in the US)...

Anonymous said...

How odd that Sailer would be searching for his own in-jokes.

But many of them have arisen from the commentariat, they are not Steve's in-jokes.

Anonymous said...

Peter Cook was described as plaing Lord Gnome, he was more than that - he was Lord Gnome.

Somebody mentioned the David Frost connection. Peter Cook was always scathing about Frost but I think there was some affection between them, Cook would never pass up the chance to make a joke even on account of friendship.

I heard an anecdote some years ago in the 80s or 90s, tried to find it online - no luck. Im paraphrasing but this is it:

Peter Cook was out drinking into the wee small hours in London with some guy (the one retailing the anecdote). Its late. 3AM or something, and they cant get a cab. Cook recognises the area they are in and says "Frosty lives round here somewhere, he'll put us up for the night." They locate his house and Cook starts throwing stones at the windows to get attention. Then a window opens and David Frost pops his head out and his only comments is "Ah, Peter, hang on, Ill let you in."

Also in 1963 Peter Cook saved David Frost from drowning, easily confirmed. Later Cook always claimed to have regretted doing so. Again, I think he preferred to mine that comedic vein rather than admit to any affection for Frost.

Five Daarstens said...

Private Eye was the inspiration for a short lived but memorable magazine called Spy magazine out of New York in the very late 80's.

APH said...

The reprise of firefighter/diversity lawsuits...And the sobering facts about the demographics of the 9/11 firefighter casualties...

Anonymous said...

This really is a fun twisted little family online, even if me and Svigor would probably come to blows IRL. (I bet he'd win, too.)

We can just get drunk first. Then it'll be fun.

Yes, only racism can bring the curmudgeons of the world together...

Reg Cæsar said...

Wikipedia hates style, wit, and originality, but occasionally some slips through, as in this...

...edit of today's featured article on Maple Syrup:

Maple syrup is a syrup usually made from human babies from Philadelphia, Connecticut, or Canada, although it can also be made from other animal species such as emus.

There were others, but this was one of the less erotic ones.

Steve Sailer said...

A friend suggests always referring to Malcolm Gladwell as Malcolm Trendwell.

Anonymous said...

"Diversity is Strength: It's also ..."

Vibrant, as in Detroit and Newark are the most vibrant communities in the US.

Sailer's Law of Female Journalism.

invade the world/invite the world/in hock to the world

Anonymous said...

The importance of baseball statistics.
Discrimination against whiter quarterbacks. And so on, Steve has tons of sports-related posts. Those are the ones I'm less eager to read.

Anonymous said...

Peter Cook was perhaps best known in Britain for his notorious 'Derek and Clive' tapes which he recorded along with his long-time comedy partner Dudley Moore.
Basically the tapes involved Pete and Dud out competeing each other to use the foulest most profane vulgarity possible in a series of comic sketches and songs.
There was a time in the 1970s when it was impossible to enter the cafeteria of any British male dominated workplace such as a factory, workshop, warehouse, garage etc without hearing the tape running and workers on their lunch break laughing their heads off.

Cowardly Annonimi said...

Unexplained Poor Performance of Local Minority: From time to time, minorities in a given town or city do not perform as well academically as the white and Asian students. Known to be caused by racism, but difficult to pinpoint source.

The Finnish: Journalistic proof when in a pinch to show for a variety of ailments: 1 Asians do not perform well because of genetics and/or 2 Asian cram/educational obsession is not effective 3 Liberal/Socialist policies produce a great society. Note: do not use for "diversity is strength" unless to say, "imagine how much better the Finnland would be in X if it were more diverse.

Internet Lesbians: humbe, dedicated, behind the scenes white males make the world more interesting.

SFG said...

"Yes, only racism can bring the curmudgeons of the world together..."

I was amused by Euronat, the association of nationalist European parties. It seems a little funny in light of WW2, when all the various European nationalists were trying to kill each other, but if you don't have ethnic exclaves to breed irredentism, nationalists can get along fine. Then again, it broke up...

SFG said...

"Too bad he did not leave a real future."

He did, it was just up to Amazon and Google to commercialize and mass-produce it.

Cowardly Annonomi under different name said...

The GAP: Socialogical phenomenon wherebey overpaid, greedy, lazy and latently racist white teachers fail to bring about equitable distribution of academic success (in a particular locality).

Public School and Private Daycare: Socio-economic phenomenon whereby white women raise black children and pay some other group to raise white children. See also, Coming Stolen Generation

Invisible Mexicans: Phenomenon whereby the American Media and Populus finds its largest and fastest growing minority to be quite boring and largely ignores it in discussions of race in favor of white/black relations which are more interesting and exciting. See also lack of hollywood mexixan stars; lack of hispanic community followers for hispanic community leaders;

Cowardly said...

The Walmart Dilemma/Decion: Deciding bewtween Racist/Sexist policies and profits; Choosing racism/sexism over profits time and again and suffering accordingly.

Kylie said...

"Private Eye was the inspiration for a short lived but memorable magazine called Spy magazine out of New York in the very late 80's."

Yes, too short-lived and still missed.

I was only able to reconcile myself to its demise years later--right here on this blog, when I first saw Steve use the adjective, "Gladwellian". Tickled me no end.

Remember how Spy invariably referred to Trump as the "short-fingered vulgarian" and Shirley Lord as the "bosomy dirty-book writer"?

Anonymous said...

I tried to introduce the term 'Ken Beefman' (in part inspired by Steve's invocation of 'beefy winbreaker wearing men' who happened to be massacred by Omar Thornton), to describe a general type of bluecollar American worker.You know the tye, the solid middle class working stiffs who built America, large and brawny in build, of Germanic origins, stolid and reliable - but utterly, utterly stiffed by both Democrats and Republicans.
'Ken Beefman' was supposed to be a stock, cartoon character rather like John Bull or Uncle Sam, 'cept no one was interested and it died on its feet.
Perhaps I should change my iSteve handle from 'Anonymous' (I'm responsible for a great deal of posts here) to 'Ken Beefman'.
Posters only known as 'anonymous' - now there's a real iSteve beef.

Drawbacks said...

By the way, Malcolm Gladwell pops up in this (only mediocre, considering the subject matter) BBC documentary about Bobby Fischer, which also had a very limited UK cinema release.
Malcolm points out that, although Bobby no doubt had a superior brain, he wouldn't have become a supreme chess player without lots and lots of practice.

Salopian said...

An "Uncle Tim"* for a white person (usually Scotch-Irish) who makes extra special efforts to combat white racism.

*After Tim Wise.

Steve has an ongoing variation on Private Eye's lookalikes theme where he compares someone held to be "black" or "hispanic" (e.g. Prime Ministers of Carribean islands, Mexican TV stars) but is in fact of mostly European ancestry, to someone who is "white". The Rev Jeremiah Wright and Bob Barr being my favourite example.

As for the Eye, whilst I occasional buy a copy to while away an hour on a train journey, its recurrent jokes and satire seem horribly stale. Its investigative journalism was always lefty establishment (Paul Foot, Francis Wheen), and it is as cosily mainstream as the BBC (for whom its editor Ian Hislop has written and presented many programmes) nowadays. The "from the messageboards" is a particular dull effort as the below the line comments at places like the Guardian contain the most interesting commentary on the news of today (and indeed led me to Steve's site some years ago).

Kylie said...

"By the way, Malcolm Gladwell pops up in this (only mediocre, considering the subject matter) BBC documentary about Bobby Fischer, which also had a very limited UK cinema release.
Malcolm points out that, although Bobby no doubt had a superior brain, he wouldn't have become a supreme chess player without lots and lots of practice."

Whoa, what a coincidence. Malcolm wouldn't have been able to make such a patently obvious observation without lots and lots of practice.

Anonymous said...

Lucky you to avoid dealing with this crook!

Maxwell was satirised on television singing "Putting out the writs" (Writs being the legal term for the application for an injunction to stop a story being published.) one of which was to stop a story that his MGN company had made a loss of £200 million rather than a £200 million profit.

When he fell overboard his skullduggery was seen for the first time by the general public.

On another note Maxwell introduced into the Mirror Group Pension schemem that nobody who was a criminal nor married to one could receive a pension from the scheme.

Elizabeth Maxwell lost her widow's pensiion due to Maxwell being a crook!

Anonymous said...

"Whoa, what a coincidence. Malcolm wouldn't have been able to make such a patently obvious observation without lots and lots of practice."

OK, that was funny.

W said...

I havent seen - but would like to see a recurring quote from Eric Holder about how we are a nation of cowards when it comes to talking about race.

Holder should be expected to come to the aid of any white male or CNN host who says something for which he is derided.

Graham said...

I agree with Salopian. I started buying Private Eye as a schoolboy in the 70s. It was okay up to the 90s then declined. It used to be unafraid and delightfully offensive. It now seems to be part of the Guardian-BBC axis. If I want to enjoy Private Eye I get one of my mildewed old copies from the basement. But it was always too obsessed with media figures and Fleet Street gossip - essentially it was written for people for whom Soho was the major part of the habitable globe.

Otto Kerner said...

By the way, contrary to the implication on this page, Wikipedia's article on the murder of Kitty Genovese does mention that the killer was African-American and it's been that way for the last few months at least.

Anonymous said...

Peter Cook was best known to me for prsenting the 'Harvey's Bristol Cream' sherry commercials, which used to appear on British TV in the mid 70s, around about Christmas time.He appeared with his comic partner Dudley Moore, both dressed as butlers.
Perhaps the biggest flop of Peter Cook's career was the movie 'Hounds of the Baskerville's.Again he teamed up with Dudley Moore, but the movie was absolutely atrocious, perhaps the worst film I've ever seen.It makes sense for the first five minutes and from then onwards descends into the most appalling nonsensical clueless, plotlees, senseless farce and drivel.I seem to remember the incidental music which largely consisted of Dudly Moore in a mock-victorian falsetto hammering away at the piano whilst shreiking 'Sir Clive!, the Hounds!' ad nauseum.
But 'Bedazzled' and 'the Wrong Box' were calssics as is that negelected masterpiece 'The Rise of Michael Rimmer' a film based on his old nemesis David Frost.

Londoner said...

I have read Private Eye for >15 years and it is indispensible - excellent satire, yes, but news that you simply can't get from any mainstream paper or broadcaster - not least because so much of it involves the crimes and corruption of those self same media outlets. Only by reading Private Eye have I gained a real understanding of just how tightly the mainstream media are controlled.

Kylie said...

"Only by reading Private Eye have I gained a real understanding of just how tightly the mainstream media are controlled."

Only by reading The Daily Mail have I gained a real understanding of just how tightly the American mainstream media are controlled when it comes to reporting black on white crime in the US.

Anonymous said...

One of the funiest little running jokes in the Eye was "Man with beard walks out".
To the uninitiated this was always the closing tag-line to a spoof report from the Liberal or Labour Party's annual conference.
To those who don't know, years ago the Liberals and Labour (but not the Tories), used to hold mass annual general meetings 'conferences' - which today are only stage-managed telegenic bulls*t - at which party policy was decided, forged in heated debates, votes, arguments and much shedding of tears.
Formerly from at least the 50s to 80s a standard trope of English political life was the 'gentle bearded leftwinger' - this referred to a standard and much loved type - the tweed wearing, gentle, well meaning but radical left school teacher or college lecturer, who was usually resplendent with a dashing DH Lawrence style beard.
When contentious policy was discussed at conference and social policy uncongenial to leftwingers was carried, you could rest assured that a bearded man in the auditorium would dramatically rise from his seat and walk out ostentatiously with a camera following him.

Londoner said...

Anonymous - the Tories do hold annual conferences and have done for many years (Thatcher was almost assassinated by the IRA at the 1984 one). Though I suspect the Labour Party did them first.

Kylie - the Daily Mail is a schizophrenic publication. It goes hammer and tongs for left-wingers, the EU, political correctness, immigration and asylum seekers, but bites its tongue hard on explicity racial issues - and in fact more or less toes the muticultural line in its general social attitudes.

Recurring jokes/themes - surprised that there have been no mentions yet of:

- outrageous transliterations of "Gadaffi"
- whitepeople and whiterpeople
- Finland being so "Finlandy"
- nice white ladies.

Londoner said...

Oh yes, Whiskey's squeals of "don't talk about this Steve! You're out of your depth!" whenever Steve talked about foreign policy or Israel. He used to call himself Evil Neocon and Testing99 in those days.

The single funniest post was probably by Lord [something] on one of the Qu'hadhafiy threads - "my mighty army of Toyota pickup trucks... there has been too much blogging, too many words... just walk away." You remember the one!

C said...

Something about some obscure sport called the leap and plunge or something to that effect.

Kylie said...

"Kylie - the Daily Mail is a schizophrenic publication. It goes hammer and tongs for left-wingers, the EU, political correctness, immigration and asylum seekers, but bites its tongue hard on explicity racial issues - and in fact more or less toes the muticultural line in its general social attitudes."

Yes, I realize that--and it's still better than the newspapers here. It will at least usually identify a black suspect or criminal as black. And when it doesn't, it will publish a photo. Our newspapers--and I read news articles from all over the U.S.--are far more reluctant to mention the race of a non-white suspect or criminal. They even avoid publishing names and photos if the perps are non-white. Of course, let a suspect be white and prior criminal activity, gun ownership, white nationalist ties, etc. will all be stated or implied, if at all possible.

Londoner said...

Kylie - yes. I tend to think our media are bad for this but there is no question that yours are worse.

The BBC is notorious for whitewashing the race of criminals... and yet it has a monthly programme called 'Crimewatch' which features dozens of mugshots and cctv clips of vibrant criminals, with barely a paleface to be seen (and you can be sure they include as many of the latter as possible). The nice white lady presenters are visibly embarrassed by the whole thing - it's quite entertaining.

Anonymous said...

'Two cheeks of the same ass'

The perfect metaphor, I think, when describing the duopoly of American politics - and the freezing out of the stolid white middle class by the diversity/immigration/ globalist/neo-co/pro Israeli/free trade/Wall Streeter/Goldman Sachs/immigrationist/WSJ/The Economist/The 1%/Affirmative Action
lobby that controls both the Republicans and Democrats.
I try to introduce the phrase and its meaning here.Sometimes it gets past the censor, sometiomes not.All depens, mthinks, if Steve happens to be tickled by vulgarity of the scat kind one day or if the Catholic prudish hat is being worn.
Strangely enough, it is not an old Australian saying - although it seems typical of Ozzy earthiness, mateyiness and bonhomie, no, I believe it was actually coined by one George Galloway MP, a hard left Labour Party Scot, when discussing Tony Blair and Gordon Brown.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I'm fully aware that the UK Conservative Party has always held annual conferences, but what I should have said is that these have always been rather vapid, meaningless PR stunts full of clean cut men in sharp suits, blue rinse ladies etc, that were done for nothing but show and meeting and greeting.In short, they were a stale joke.
Until recently Labour and Liberal conferences actually decided policy and were the seat of rage, deep seated arguments and acrimony.Who can forget the Tony Benn/Denis Healey face off in 1981?
Now they are just as wanky-weak as Tory conferences.
In the good old days they were full of angry bearded leftwingers wearing vile pull-overs, thick northern accents, hard left bully boys, genuine socialists etc - and they put on a damn good show.It was classic telly entertainment, live as it happened.
Remember when 'fatty' Heffer stormed out of Neil Kinnock's anti-Militant denunciation speech?

Reg Cæsar said...

Kylie - the Daily Mail is a schizophrenic publication. It goes hammer and tongs... but bites its tongue hard... --Londoner

Maybe that explains the longstanding frustration of its staff? Cf.:

It's the dirty story of a dirty man
And his clinging wife doesn't understand.
The son is working for the Daily Mail,
It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer...

I always wonder how the populist press in Britain and Australia treat the gun issue. Do they trust their readership, or insult them, like Murdoch's gang did in Oz?

Kylie said...

"Kylie - yes. I tend to think our media are bad for this but there is no question that yours are worse."

Yes, that was my point originally. I didn't mean to imply that your media are forthright about race, only that the Mail is more honest than our papers. Sorry if I wasn't clearer.

"The BBC is notorious for whitewashing the race of criminals..."

Heck, yes. The BBC online is as bad as any of the papers here.